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Friday, December 17, 2010

So I know that for the most part this site is all about the positive and that is what I should be focused on... but I have to tell you...I'm just not feeling it right now.
I just read my last post which was from over a month ago and I could have posted the same thing today. I feel overwhelmed with my day to day without even adding the holiday season into things. The holidays are having a particularly negative effect on me this year.
Our tree is up as are the decorations, the kids are excited of course, and I am doing my best to be festive but truth is that I want to cry. The only thing I want for Christmas is to have a happy and supportive marriage and that's not something you get with wishing. I am putting all my effort into this life of mine, but I can't be the only person to give.
I feel drained and sad.
Sorry to be a downer, but I needed to get some of this out of myself...
the baby calls...
I hope that everyone is having a happy holiday season.
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHOYER 12/17/2010 2:34PM

    I remember those days well, even though they are long gone for me.

I remember crying once to my husband, saying, "During her first nap I eat breakfast, during her second one I hurry up and take a shower, and all I eat for lunch is a cheese sandwich and a pear because I can do that with one hand."

Eventually I realized it was hard for him to understand something he would never experience, and even then I felt like there was something wrong with me that I couldn't do better.

SP is for support and hopefully you feel a little of that when you're on here. I wish the best (and better days and nights) for you.

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NATURALKRISTIN 12/17/2010 12:38PM

    We are so on the same page. I think SP is not just about the positive, but about the venting as well. I hope you know that it is ok to feel the way you do. What you feel is true because you are living it.

Do the best you can at this moment for your children and your family. That is all we can do. Things always work out, one way or another. It may not be the way you expected or wanted, but time does it's thing, no matter what. Get some Mother's Tea, pick up that babe and nurse her. Smell her, watch her, love her. Sometimes that is all I can do.

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