Our "non wedding"
Sunday, November 14, 2010
A year ago I blogged about how we became engaged but didn't want or need a big or fancy wedding. For that year we discussed several scenarios: a cook out where the guests didn't know we were getting married til the JP showed up/inviting our children and parents for dinner and surprising them/eloping in Vegas/or even just sneaking down to the town hall. You get the picture. We discussed it til we were so sick of discussing it that we didn't discuss it at all any more.
No matter what we decided people were gonna be disappointed. If we invited all the people we love it couldn't be small and intimate (and inexpensive!!) and WE would be disappointed. If we invited our children and parents our brothers and sisters would be upset (I have 6 and he has 5,plus spouses). If we pretended we were having a cookout and sprung it on them the people who didn't come would say "If you told me you were getting married I would have came.'' Blah Blah,we couldn't decide. (The reason for not telling them was that we do not want or need our family and friends spending $ on us,we have everything we need and more and also because people sometimes "mean well" and try to help with arrangements and before you know it the thing escalates and it's nothing like what you had wanted in the first place.
On November 6th ( a year and a day after we got engaged) we went to Tampa,Florida on vacation. I can honestly say it was the best vacation a girl could ask for. My guy spoiled me rotten. Breakfast in bed every morning, attractions and shopping every afternoon and don't you worry about those nights,he had em covered ;) We were so happy and relaxed.
On November 10th we got up late and went shopping for a new bathing suit for me. We walked because the mall was only about a mile from our hotel and I needed some exercise. We passed at least 3 places that you could get married at. Neither one of us said a word.
We put on our suits and headed to the pool. I was thinking about the signs I had seen but we were leaving the next morning and didn't even have a license. I knew he saw them too and I was a little hurt that he didn't say anything but neither did I.
We met a couple who were about our age and they asked how long we'd been married...next thing I knew we were in our room ripping through the phone book to get a license. I changed while he made phone calls and we hailed a cab to the city hoping to make City Hall in time (it was about 3pm) We made our way to the clerks office and filled out the required paperwork still not knowing when or where we would do it. I was trying to decide what I would wear,how would I fix my hair,where we would buy the rings,etc when the clerk asked "Do you want to do it now?" In unison we said "YES!!"
There were no flowers,guests, or rings. Just two people who truly love each other and wanted to be a family. My camera was in my purse and I didn't even ask the clerk to take our picture. I don't need one,I will never forget how he was looking at me. It was perfect. I was in flip flops without makeup with wet hair and to him I was the most beautiful woman in the world. I don't doubt that for a second. He was wearing jean shorts and a Mohegan Sun Tshirt,looking like he was about to mow the lawn and I have never loved him more.