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ARDUINNA
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Musical Genius of Ragnarok (as told to the Bard Loki)

Tuesday, November 09, 2010

My Least Favorite Things or Not Until the Fat Lady Sings

(Sung to the tune of My Favorite Things)

Crying and envying,
Huffing and Puffing.
Saying "I'm 12 stone"
and knowing I'm bluffing.
Trying on bras
to have them leave rings.
These aren't a few of my favorite things.


chorus
On a diet,
when I'm craving,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember these horrible things,
and then I don't feel so bad!


Sucking in, squeezing
and shopping Lane Bryant.
Trying in size 12 jeans
that aren't compliant.
Gettin' a skin burn
Tween my thighs that stings,
These aren't a few of my favorite things.


Chorus
On a diet,
when I'm craving,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember these horrible things
and then I don't feel so bad!


Stretch marks, cellulite,
and elastic clothing.
Insecurity an'
lots of self loathing.
Swim season and
all the grief that it brings.
These aren't a few of my favorite things.


Chorus
On a diet,
When I'm craving,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember these horrible things,
and then I don't feel so bad!

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