Wednesday, November 03, 2010
I'm beyond livid! All that hard work and progress.... gone. Why? Because I took my eye off the ball and started lying to myself... again. I had returned from a deployment, was shifting gears from being downrange to back home, excited that I was moving from Ft Polk back to Ft Leavenworth where my family was waiting for me, thrilled that I'd been sent to school for the Senior Leadership Course... and what did I do? I got complacent and lazy.
Oh... I'd contiued working out every day. Heck, I even was doin' the happy dance when I hit 230 pounds. My goal was not only in sight, but very achievable and brushing against the tips of my fingers. And then, my new job sent me on a series of business trips. Don't get me wrong... it wasn't the trips that put the weight back on. It was me. Bottom line, I started lying to myself. "I don't have time to work out today, I'll get it tomorrow." " Hey, I've lost a lot of weight, that Snickers bar/doughnut/fat-pill du jour won't hurt me if I make up for it in exersize tomorrow." On and on, the lies kept coming... and I believed them. Why? Well, they were things I wanted to hear from someone I trusted... me. Whoda known I was getting advice from a complete idiot? Oh, yeah... it was that idiot which got me into weight trouble to begin with. Well... you listen to an idiot and that makes you an insane fool. Why insane? Well... you tell ME? What do YOU call it when you do the same stooooopid things over and over again and expect different results? (That IS the definition of crazy, right? *eyeroll*)
Well... NO MORE!!!! WAR HAS BEEN DECLARED!!!!!!
They say it takes several times of getting kicked in the dirt, followed by climbing your bruised and battered self back up into the saddle before bad habits can be changed into good ones. As my wife keeps telling me... baby steps. *sigh* I do hafta say... Fast food places no longer have any kind of allure as they once did. I really would rather eat at home rather than wrap my lips around a Big Mac. Problem is, when travelling, it becomes too convenient to grab a bit to eat at these places, or else I wind up skipping meals; neither choice is any good. And while I try to mitigate all the fat atoms I'm inhaling by making the best health conscious choices I can at these establishments, I often get fooled by eating things I think are healthier, but are really calorie bombs in disguise.
So... here we go again. The food journal here is my friend.... let's continue to learn this time on the merry-go-round.