Not doing well

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

On so many levels right now. The fact that this is my PMS week is not helping matters any either. But I just want to throw in the towel, crawl under a rock and die! I am feeling so alone anymore, feeling so stacked with seemingly unreachable tasks. I'm tired. I want to be able to just be for awhile. Not to have to constantly battle, worry, struggle. I hate this time of year too. Having no family makes things rough. I think I may just skip Thanksgiving all together, I don' t have the strength in me to do it. I am soooo tired!! Every little thing is making me cry anymore.

I am tired of "explaining" to "friends" why I am pulling my 10 year old son out of public school to cyber school him because he has been dealing with 3 years of physical and mental bullying. My "friends" are all telling me all I am teaching him is to cop out!! WTH?!? You deal with the most loving, kind hearted kid you'll ever know that is constantly ostracized, picked on and beat up and the tell me different. I am so tired.

I need help right now, I don't know what but I feel like I am drowning in all that's around me. I want my mommy so badly right now. Oh God, it just hurts so bad. I am just praying that by the end of the week I am more normal. Because I can' t go on like this!

Hope everyone else is having a good day!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    OMG hang in there. I am so sorry to hear you are going through so much. I don't want to pry (since I don't know you), but have you talked to a professional about any of this? I am taking something for PMDD (antidepressant)and it seems to be helping. I hate to see ANYONE feeling like this. Anytime you want to vent please feel free to drop me a note. Hang in there and I know you are doing the best thing for your child, so don't listen to the so called "friends"!!
    2676 days ago
    I am so sorry for your son. I think the bullying has just gotten so out of hand. Maybe its me but it just seems like the mean guys end up with their foot on top of the sweet people. You almost have to be a mean guy to get ahead. Sad but true. I suppose I understand what your friends are saying, but I am totally with you. I would not allow my kids to be bullied. That is exactly why the never told me about it until they graduated. They know I would have stepped up for them. Good for you for stepping up for your son.

    Have you considered a homeschooling spark team? that might be the thing to do. I know from speaking with my friends, there are all sorts of programs and resources for homeschoolers. Goodluck with it all! I feel your pain just from reading your post.

    2676 days ago
    It seems as if you have a plan, so put it in place. It may help both you AND your son if you were to speak with his teacher and find out why they feel things have gotten to this point. Realize that he will face the same criticism as an adult if he is not coached or guided in how to handle those difficult situations.

    I'm sure not everyone of your friends can travel to their families, have spouses or a significant other in their life right now . . . have a non traditional pot luck Thanksgiving with friends.
    2676 days ago
    Sending huge hugs! Sounds like you need a night out! Lets do it, you let me know when and we will go out! I think you are doing the right thing for you and your son! You are an awsome person, friend and most importantly mom. You have fought this for so long and not just in one place, I think you have made the right descision. I am a bit jealous of you being able to do this for your son, there are so many fantastic opportunities out there for the cyber and home schooled kids. Sorry everything sucks right now, keep fighting, you will win! emoticon
    2676 days ago
    i'm sending you a hug as well! just know that you aren't alone. thanksgiving is whatever you make it, even if you and your son celebrate each other over a bowl of cereal.

    2676 days ago
    I am so very sorry you are having such a awful time. I agree you do have family, your son and he loves you ! I raised 4 kids by myself so I kind of know how you feel! Just remember we are here for you and it WILL get better!
    2676 days ago
    Hey sweetie, I'm sending you a hug. emoticon
    Schools are getting worse every year and I can't blame you for pulling your son out.
    You do have family.... your children. You don't have to go all out on Thanksgiving, it's not about food. It was about being alive and being together. Have fun with your kids that day. We use to have fried fish that we caught that morning with my grandfather. And if we didn't catch anything we'd roast weenies on an open fire.
    Sure beat any turkey I ever ate.
    2676 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/26/2010 2:51:32 PM
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