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    NIKIMO11  
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WHATS MY PURPOSE?


Tuesday, October 05, 2010

dO YOU EVER WONDER WHAT YOUR REAL PURPOSE IS IN LIFE? I REALLY NEVER DO. BUT NOW I AM. IT STARTED A FEW DAYS AGO. IT'S BEEN ALMOST 6 MONTHS SINCE I STARTED SPARKS. I'VE BEEN WALKING ON REGULAR BASES. I SEE THE RESULTS WHEN I TAKE MY SUGARS. THEIR ARE ALMOST NORMAL. I HAVE LOST ABOUT 10-11 LBS. I READ MY BIBLE ATLEAST 3 TIMES A WEEK. I AM TRYING TO IMPROVE ON MY PRAYER LIFE. MY CHILDREN ARE ALL GONE FROM HOME. I AM LIVING CURRENTLY W/ MY PARENTS. WHO ARE GETTING ELDERLY. ALTHOUGH I DON'T " TAKE CARE " OF THEM. THEY GET AROUND PRETTY WELL THEMSELVES. I FIND MYSELF WONDERING WHAT IS NEXT? I KNOW THAT MY FIRST PRIORITY IS TO MOVE OUT OF HERE. BUT I CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT A JOB. I WOULD LOVE TO HELP OTHER WOMEN, BUT ALTHOUGH I HAVE CHEKED A FEW PLACES , THEY HAVE NEVER GOTTEN BACK TO ME. SO NOW I JUST SIT AND PONDER WHAT IS MY PURPOSE.
MY MOTHER THINKS THAT I'M NOT MOTIVATED ENOUGH AND FEELS I AM WASTING MY LIFE AWAY. WHEN SHE SAYS THINGS SUCH AS " AREN'T YOU LOOKING FOR A JOB? OTHER PEOPLE ARE GETTING JOBS. " THIS SETS ME INTO ONE OF MY DEPRESSION MODES. AS I SUFFER FROM CHRONIC DEP0RESSION. HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS.. I KNOW THAT THE LORD HAS A GREAT PURPOSE FOR ME. I'M JUST A LITTLE SLOW IN UNDERSTANDING. OR IS IT THAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND "HIM" AT ALL. I WONDER WHAT MY PURPOSE IS IN CHRIST'S PLAN. HIS WORD SAYS THAT THE CROSS OF BURDEN IS NOT MORE THAN WE CAN BARE. AND ALTHOUGH I READ HIS WORD EVERY DAY AND PRAY I FIND MYSELF A LITTLE DOUBTFUL AND CONFUSED TO IF I'M IN LINE TO HIS WORD. MY SON TOLD ME NOT TO WORRY ABOUT MY PURPOSE. BUT AT 57 YEARS OLD YOU STOP AND LOOK BACK TO THINGS IN YOUR LIFE. MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T ASK THIS QUESTION. . THE TRUTH IS WHEN MY BABIES WERE YOUNG MY PURPOSE WAS TO TAKE CARE OF THEM. MAKE SURE THEIR NEEDS WERE MET AND TO GUIDE THEM THROUGH LIFE AS SO NOT TO MAKE WRONG DECISIONS. AS THEY GREW MY PURPOSE WAS TO GIVE THEM A GOOD EAR TO LISTEN TO. A SHOULDER TO LEAN ON AND AGAIN TEACH THEM RIGHT FROM WRONG. NOW THAT THEY ARE RAISING BABIES OF THEIR OWN, I HOPE I TAUGHT THEM TO BE GOOD CITIZENS , GREAT PARENTS , AND SHOWED THEM OF GOD'S WORD AND WAYS. TO LOVE THEIR FELLOW MAN. TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER, I GUESS I STILL HAVE A PURPOSE. TO CONTINUE TO NOURISH MY FAMILY. TO BE THERE WHEN THEY NEED ME. TO GIVE A HELPING HAND WHEN THEY NEED IT. OFCOURSE TO SPOIL MY BABIES. TO SHOW THEM CHRIST'S FACE IN ME. TO TEACH THEM ABOUT CHRIST AND HIS ROAD TO SALVATION. TO PRAY FOR THEM EACH AND EVERY DAY. TO LET THEM KNOW THAT I LOVE THEM AND CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM. ALSO TO HELP OTHER PEOPLE. TO GIVE WHEN I CAN. AND WHEN I CAN'T PRAY FOR THEM. THE LORD IS MY PURPOSE. HE IS THE ONE WHO IN THE END MATTERS MOST OF ALL. MATTHEW 11:28 SAYS : COME UNTO ME ALL YE THAT LABOUR AND ARE HEAVY LADEN AND I WILL GIVE YOU REST. VERSE 30: FOR MY YOKE IS EASY , AND MY BURDEN IS LIGHT. I THANK GOD FOR HIS EVERY DAY BLESSINGS. BIG AND SMALL. .. MAY GOD BLESS YOU.
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