Understanding and working through setbacks-if you chose to call the that.

Monday, October 04, 2010

Years ago while making excuses to a friend about why I couldn't do certain things she responded with some words that changed my life. She said, "Things will always happen every day, it's how you chose to respond that will get you where you are." Very powerful words.

I reflected on these recently while sitting in the ER in pain being told I had a hernia and needed surgery. As you can image I spent a week out of commition on pain medication and going to surgery consults. Triggers left and right were calling me to turn to my old friend the emotional eater.

From this I learned a couple of things that were blessings and lifted me out of old habits that truly sabatoge my efforts. First I saw what I was wanting to do and why. Second where I usually gave in and binged on fatty foods I had a healthy snack and enjoyed company with a friend talking about my fears.

At first that negative thinker chimed in and said ah ha see you are failing, then I listened in to my weekly group nutritional cleansers support call. I heard something interesting I could relate to that made me feel proud and send thatnegative voice packing. Our coach remined us of how as we get healthier we make different choices. Where we would have binged before we now have an extra piece of fruit. And that is ok. This is a lifestyle change that is to last a lifetime and as things come up it is only human to respond. How I responded to my stressful event was in no way as severe as heading to the bakery for that 2000 calorie piece of cake.

In the past I could have easily put on 5 pounds. This time I did not. I focused on recovery and loved myself with compasion, good nutrition, and exercise. I didn't make weightloss my priority these last to weeks. My priority was to maintain while processing this stressful event. Having suceeded I feel I have gained so much more. I can't tell you how good it feels to have been able to do that without gaining weight!

Now I feel back on track, still eating right and exercising. I am not defeated this time :o) Yeah. My surgery is about a month away and I am working no bringing the strongest me possible to that OR table. Thankful to feel that a hernia is a pretty small problem easily solved and I can continue my progress. :o)

Have you ever given thought to how these events that happen in life are not so much setbacks but a part of life? How do you chose to view lifes less than ideal moments? My hopes is by sharing this food for thought helps you take another more loving and nurturing outlook to these moments. Give youself time to heal, love and take care of yourselves while always reminding yourselves of the positive or surrounding yourselves with those who can if you need help. My ear is always open ;o)

Have a wonderful day.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post

    thank you for sharing this!! =)
    2688 days ago
    What an awesome feeling free. Thank you for sharing that. You made my day. But remember it was your wilpower that truly gave you the strength to hold back. Love you dear. Keep the strength! emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2688 days ago
    You've inspired me not to binge tonight. Bless you!

    2689 days ago
  • U2CUSE16
    It's wonderful that you're taking a situation that might derail most people and learning to stay positive from it. I haven't always been able to follow things like what your friend said to you, but I'm learning. In about a month and a half, I've turned from eating through bags of chips and cheetos, to finding time (time which was always there) to work out 4 times a week at least. I've been tracking consistently and finally bought a scale again. For so long, I've ignored being better to myself and then would be unhappy when nothing changed. I wish you continued success and a great surgery (that sounds funny!). emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2691 days ago
  • OUREB33
    That was such a great blog and very motivated. Hope you have a quick recovery after surgery.

    2692 days ago
    2692 days ago
    What an awesome blog. Struck a chord in me; needed to hear it bad today. Thanks be to God that I ran across it, and you :)
    2692 days ago
    Thanks Kbuck. It's still a work in progress that is getting more consistent over time with practice. We'll get there :o) The group calls and guided meditation (emphasizing self love and positive thinking) I do when I notice negative thoughts creeping in really helps turn how I am viewing things around. Olny been at it for 4 months now but wow what a difference it makes. I don't let stress consume me as much anymore. Wow what a freedom that is. As does being able to share in my successes and hear from others of their own and how they achieved them. More tools for the tool belt :o) I am loving this sparks team and the wonderful people who inspire me everyday with their kind hearts and tenacity to reach their goals. For that reason I love keeping my goals small. It feels so much better to celebrate many small successes that add up over time than feel as though I am reaching for the impossible. Keeps the motivation flowing! Thanks for all the love everyone and remember to be kind to yourselves. Love you all~nighty night.
    2692 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/5/2010 1:16:53 AM
    I so agree with what you have said especially regarding the events in ones life. Have always felt things happen in our lives for a reason even when we don't understand why.

    Also agree with the positive thinking but don't have it working as good for me as you do but have not given up. With your positive attitude know you will accomplish the goals you have set for yourself.

    Your attitude will also help with getting through your surgery and the recovery time.
    2692 days ago
    What awesome responses. Thank you guys so much. Smiling ear to ear!
    2692 days ago
    I have to agree with other posters - you have a GREAT attitude and an AWESOME blog! Keep up the great work.
    2692 days ago
    What a beautiful blog! You are doing such a great job and have a wonderful attitude. I do understand what you're saying. When my husband passed unexpectedly 2 years ago, I wanted to just pull the blankets over my head and tell the world to go away but I didn't. I had read something very close to what your friend had said to you and those words also had an impact on me.

    Thanks for sharing. You warm my heart.

    emoticon Mary Anne
    2692 days ago
    What a great attitude!
    2692 days ago
    Such a wonderful blog, and I'm so happy for you that you're seeing the changes in yourself and how you treat yourself. I know you will keep taking care of you and I hope this makes your surgery smooth and easy and no big deal. And I also have experienced some of what you're talking about. In fact, just last night amid angst over my car and stress about confronting the person who was supposed to be working on it, and losing more work (and so on), I wanted to go to the bakery and get something soooo badly!!! I haven't eaten refined sugar treats since July (except on special occasions, but none as an emotional crutch), and so instead, I bought a honey crisp apple and ate half of it with some peanut butter. I went a little over my calorie range, but that's OK...
    We can do this...we ARE doing this!
    2692 days ago
  • JABS2017
    I hope your surgery goes well :) I'm so glad you are staying positive!
    2692 days ago
    Great blog! It really makes you think about this life and what's important.
    2692 days ago
    I Luke that B thank you!
    2692 days ago
  • B-N-ME
    Best of luck with the surgery, and the month in waiting! The small changes we make one day at a time are what create our healthier tomorrows.
    2692 days ago
    I have been in that emergency room like you and being with sparks has made me aware of the choices I make .I am currently waiting for two surgeries am I am having problems with not being able to exercise during this time.Learning to eat for the right reason is a big reason we are here at sparks.
    2692 days ago
    Thank you for sharing your story! It gives hope to many of us who turn to food as a source of comfort, and it proves that we are not alone.

    Best of luck with your surgery, although with your attitude, it'll be smooth sailing!
    2692 days ago
    Sorry about your hernia! Nice blog!
    2692 days ago
    Stress, boredom and anxiety eater here! Thanks for the inspiring blog. There is hope for me! Good luck on your surgery.
    2692 days ago
    Like you, I USED to turn to food for comfort. Again like you, I now find myself turning to friends for comfort, whether they be "real-life" friends or Spark friends. I'm learning to handle stressful events in a totally new manner and am gradually making progress in doing so. I use a lot of "self-talk" and talk myself through situations - acknowledging my feelings and the reasons why to myself. I continually assure myself that I can handle the situation - that I am in control.
    Stay positive!
    2692 days ago
    I am a terrible stress eater. Your blog gives me hope, maybe someday I will be able to look back like you are now. I am so proud of you for the steps you have taken.
    I hope all goes well with your surgery. I hope you will keep me posted.
    2692 days ago
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