Friday, September 24, 2010
When I was young, I was told that if I found one true friend in this world, I would be very fortunate. Well, I have found several. I have a small inner circle, who I truly cherish. This past week, I have just been blown away by the actions of two people, in particular.
One of my friends is a dentist. I have known Etta and Lia (Etta's hygenist), for about 15 years now. I always say the have watched me grow up (although, hell, will I every be fully grown-up? I doubt it...LOL!). We started becoming closer last year, getting together for dinner and such. I see Etta's daughter, now grown-up and in college; Nat has blossomed into a gorgeous young lady. I think it was was because of me that the friendship grew slowly; I tend to hold people at arm's length for awhile until I see what they are made of. I also have changed emotionally; I have grown even more since I hit the big 40. Not that I have ever lived by a lot of rules, but I have allowed society and other people to dictate how I should live my live, to an extent. Since I turned 40 a few years ago, I basically have said "F it; I am going to do whatever the hell I want to". That includes allowing people into my life if feels right to me. I don't want to miss out on some great experiences in life for the sake of protecting my heart all the time. I know that you win some and you lose some.
So, last week I had to go see Etta because one of my fillings had issues; it turned out part of one of them had broken off. So, while she was repairing it, I told her about the upcoming surgery. Now, Lia and I had already discussed it months ago and I just assumed she had communicated it to Etta. But, they are very professional and abide by the patient/doctor confidentiality law and Etta never knew. Well, later in the day, I get this email from her offering for her and Lia to be at the hospital with me. She said they loved me and didn't want me to go through it alone, no matter what the news was at the outcome. Of course, me being me, I said thank you so much but no need. She said to let them know if I changed my mind. I knew that she had patients and it would be like an 1.5 - 2 hour drive for her to the hospital.
Then I spoke to Rick, who is like a father to me. Rick and his wife, Sharon, live seven hours away and could not be at the hospital with me. Now, they know how I am; I have always relied on myself and it works for me. I know that I can get myself through just about anything and, if I rely on myself, I rarely get let down. Rick said that he was uneasy about me being at the hospital alone and that I needed to allow myself to depend on my friends, especially if they offered. He knew that K was supposed to be at the hospital but he also knew there was a chance he wouldn't follow through.
So, I relented. I emailed Etta and said that I would love it if her and Lia were at the hospital with me. Etta proceeded to reschedule her patients for the day and her and Lia drove up and were there in time to be with me in the prep room. Can you believe it? Who does that these days? Who extends themselves that far for someone????? She is a doctor, in private practice, and she effing rescheduled her patients!! To be with me!! I was, quite simply, blown away. The two of them are so generous and their hearts are so big.
As it turns out, although I initially did not want anyone there, I was very glad that they were. They saved my rear end. What with all of the difficulties after the surgery, and the disappointment from K not being there, it was an enormous relief that they were they. They stayed all day; through the vomiting, the tears over K, the pain of the pancreatitis attack, the "happiness" of the Dilautid, etc.
And then it took them three hours to get home; as always, 95 was a goddamn nightmare. They both just took it in stride.
On Tuesday, as soon as he found out that K never showed, my friend Bill (I call him Will.i.Am) immediately texted me and said "do you want me to come up?". I didn't even try to argue with him. He hopped right in his car and came up and spent the afternoon with me. He called and texted every day to make sure things were going okay. He even effing told the nurse that I wasn't urinating enough...hahahahaha! I told him that was the last time I would confide in him!!..LOL! Will.i.Am said that not everyone would make him a cheesecake (I made him one last weekend for his birthday, which is today; he said it was ORGASMIC..hahahahahahahaha!) and that I was a special girl (I think he means that I am crazy as hell..).
I also have a girlriend, Gina, who couldn't make it to the hospital but was always BBMing me and calling me. Gina is a busy girl and she still took time out from her schedule to make time for me. She stopped over last night to see how I was doing. Gina and I are new "friends-in-progress"; we do share a lot of personality characteristics and I was just touched that, being that she really doesn't know me, still made the time for me.
I sent the three girls yellow roses when I got home yesterday; the yellow rose signifies friendship. Gina called and said I made her day with the flowers; that no one does things like that anymore. She said it goes to show that you may not even realize when you do something that means the world to someone else. She had no idea what she did for me; but, for me, she helped to get me through a really crappy experience. What Etta and Lia did for me; well, that's one for the recordbooks.
I know how lucky I am. I think, a lot of times, that people take their friends for granted and assume that everyone has friends. Not everyone does have friends and I feel sadness for the people that don't. Friendships do take work and I don't think that people understand that. That being said, the benefits are so rewarding. It's the intangibles in life that mean the most to me.
My boss may be a millionaire but I think I am wealthier than he is; my friendships make it so.