Sunday, September 19, 2010
Hey Fellow Sparkies! I hope you are doing better than I.
I wiped out all of my alloted calories with breakfast. And I am not even full.
I do things like this when I am convinced my body is betraying me. I eat at it. Not really a stellar thing to do, but there it is.
My body has been betraying me for a couple weeks now, and I am really p---ed at it.
I can't tell if it is my back or my hip or both. You know how pain radiates? Well, mine is radiating big time, and I am terribly grumpy about it.
I went to the Doc on Friday, and couldn't get in to see my regular guy. Instead, I got their "new man".
I saw him with an attitude of co-operation, and was willing to have a good rapport with him. I think he saw things differently.
I live in a small community where everyone is very open and friendly with everyone else. We care about each other, and it shows in the way we treat each other.
This guy has a long way to go if he is going to fit in here!!
There I am, telling him what is going on with my 66+ year old body, and his eyes glaze over.
I know he is not listening to me when he asks if I have taken any aspirin for my aches and arthritis.
I try to tell him that I have had the same body for a long time now, and know what goes on with it.
He asks me to stand and try to touch my toes. Another sign he is not listening. I tell him if I could bend over and touch my toes without excrutiating pain, I wouldn't be there seeing him.
He decides to see if my legs twitch when he taps them with his little hammer. They don't.
Then he says for me to make a fist of my right hand and see if I can keep him from pulling my arm away from my body. Instead, I pull HIM toward my body, which he obviously doesn't like.
This guy has the "bedside manner" rating of dirty laundry. That charming!
Anyway, he then brings up kidney stones, which I have already told him I do NOT have (proof of his great listening talent), and he asks me to deliver a pee sample.
He says he is "about 100% sure that I have a kidney stone or infection of the bladder". I tell him he is wrong.
So he does the pee check test, comes back and says "There is no sign of infection at all", for which I suppose I should have thanked him. Instead, I said "I told you that in the first five minutes of the appointment".
Any way, he decides I do not need any pictures taken of my hip or back "because all it would show is the metal in your back". Then he writes me a prescription for 600 miligrams of ibuprofen and another for a muscle relaxer.
They do nothing but cause constipation.
He has greatly increased my sense of body betrayal, and I begin to act accordingly to my old patterns. I begin to eat at my body.
DH came home with one of those big tins of Royal Dansk butter cookies, and the can is nearly empty.
He also brought home some Costco Apple Crumb muffins, which he knows I love. They are now gone, too.
Let me tell you about those muffins. I looked up the information AFTER I had eaten one with butter and milk for breakfast, and it is 970 calories PER MUFFIN.
So, with the muffin, butter and milk, I succeeded in wiping out all of my alloted caloric allowance for the day. And it isn't even lunch time yet.
I wonder if they are worth it, and still haven't answered my question about that.
So here I am, putting on tonnage like there is no tomorrow, and not being able to do much of anything that resembles working out.
My Team Leader, Karen, has asked my to co-lead the team Port Angeles and the Surrounding Areas. I was going to say "no", but I don't think I should.
I think it just might be very good for me. I like leading, and I love the team.
Perhaps if I accept her offer, I won't wipe out on muffins or cookies before ten in the morning!
It would no doubt get me back in gear, so I guess I better send her an acceptance letter and start all over with doing the program the RIGHT way!