Tuesday, September 07, 2010
I've been away from spark-people for quite some time. My computer was broken, still is. My friends are going to help me fix it for me when I move. I'm now in the process of moving so I'm not quite sure when I'll have internet...I guess we'll see. I'm moving this week into a beautiful new home with lovely roommates. I've got a huge cozy room and I can't wait to decorate it! It will be peaceful and quiet and I'll be able to do my art like crazy!
I feel like I'll finally have the freedom to get back to being myself again, being healthy, artistic and active...lately I've been depressed, lazy, and uncreative...I've been stuck in a rut, very depressed and hating where I live and hating how badly I am treated by the people I live with...If only you could hear the things they say and do to me that I don't even do anything to deserve to receive such treatment! It's completely unprovoked...I thought this was my family...I guess I was wrong...but it doesn't matter, the people I love and who love me back are my real family even if they're not related by blood. I'd do anything for them, and they'd do the same for me. So I guess I do have a family after all. I've pretty much disowned all of my blood family now for their terrible treatment to me all except my sister...such is life...I suppose. I'm glad I have her, and my best friends. I love them all dearly, and of course my pets too!
I can't wait for this change. I hate where I live right now. It's so far away from everything that I never feel like doing anything...but when I move to my new home I'm close to everything! The club, fitness classes, yoga classes, all sorts of awesome fitness stuff I can get involved in! I really can't wait. With my beautiful new home it will be hard to stay indoors for the remainder of the summer.
When I get everything all set up I want to fully return to spark-people, take control of my life and eat healthier and get back into exercising because honestly I haven't exercised truly for weeks and I feel lazy and depressed about it. I want to get fit again...I'm at my goal weight, but you know what? My muscle tone is crap. My skin and muscles should be firm and tight, but no...I'm just lean with...with...lack of...lack of muscle tone. So it's just kinda squishy...I hate it.
I want my muscle tone and firm skin healthy feeling body back. Only that can come from healthy eating and regular exercise...for the most part I've been eating fairly healthy...but I have not been exercising at all. This needs to change. This I promise to improve, and when I move I will have no excuses not to!
So I guess that's all for now, I'm really tired and I need to get to bed so I can spend the day packing!