Wednesday, August 25, 2010
I don't over eat when I'm sad, I don't over eat when I'm angry or mad, I don't over eat when I'm tired, I don't over eat when I'm happy,,,
I did find out after joining SP that I over eat when I'm perfectly fine and not paying any attention to how many times my hand goes into the basket of chips, cookies, etc. I fit the definition of mindless eater to a "T"...and have been working on that.
...but I knew there was something else that I just couldn't quite put my finger on...and then the other day - Bingo... there it was - in full force. I was at working on a team project and I was the person who had to receive everything from everyone else and get everything put into the system...and we have an absolute deadline. Every year, I am promised we will start earlier the next year - and it has yet to happen. And this year is the absolute worst of all years - everyone has been waaaaayyyyy behind. The first day someone put a major delay into the system, I realized I reached for an unhealthy snack, and then another, and then another. Same thing the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that. I don't even want to step on the scale b/c I know I will see a weight gain... I have stopped tracking anything after lunch b/c I know I will be a gazillion calories.
For two nights in a row my dinner has been potato chips - and I don't mean single serving bags - I mean the big, family size bag (and I'm the only family in my house!). I come home and hit the couch b/c I'm too tired to get up and walk or exercise. The silver lining is that I have now realized another facet about my emotional eating but I am so frustrated with myself. I have been working so hard - I have to reclaim myself. I have to tell myself that it doesn't matter how anxious I am - food isn't going to take the anxiety away - but maybe a good walk with multiple deep breathes will lessen it... Ugggghhhhh!