Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Besides the obvious emotional causes behind my binges, I can't figure out if my bingeing is worse when:
a) my entire kitchen is free from ANY kind of snack food and i'm being vigilant 100% of the time
b) when i try to incorporate teeny amounts of healthy treats into my diet.
it's like i can't have ANYTHING somewhat delicious around, because I will eat it until it's gone. my binge last night was painful. i'm in actual, PHYSICAL pain today because of the amount I ate.
i don't get it-- I haven't been depriving myself or anything lately, and I feel like i've been approaching this lifestyle change in a truly healthy/realistic way this time.... is it just my T.O.M. coming? Or am I cursed with being a binge eater for the rest of my life?
i feel so sick. uuggghhh.