Monday, July 19, 2010
so here i am, halfway through another summer, weighing more than i did last summer. puuuhhh. i've got the programs (p90x, sparkpeople, you name it i've got it somewhere), my parents are practically vegans and keep the kitchen only semi-stocked so they don't overeat, and i've got the support. I just can't keep on the bandwagon. I probably should stop drinking, first of all. I know it's pointless calories and blah blah, but when you're in college (especially at a party school like mine) it's the normal thing to do. it's kind of hard to go out to the bar and not drink.
but this time it's different. I graduated at around 120-125lbs, eating whatever i wanted. i'd been active all through grade school and especially active in high school with school sports and summer swim league. These past three years of college have not boded well for me. randomly i jump into these "health kicks" where i plan everything (i'm a planner) and make lots and lots of lists and goals. then two weeks later nothing happens. I eat out of boredom and habit. Sometimes i'll bring a box of cheezits to read and not even eat any, it's just the comfort of having food there. How ridiculous! How did i get so stuck on food?
and how did it get so stuck on me?