It's Been Over A Year, but I Still Haven't Fully Adjusted Mentally
Sunday, July 18, 2010
I just realized that I have been wearing "normal" sized clothing for over a year now. I made my first size 16 purchase in May of 2009, and in January of 2010 I got into a 10. I have gained almost 15 pounds since April of this year, but I am still comfortably in a 12, and that sure beats my size 28/30's any day. I am sure when my life goes back to normal (hopefully my husband finds a job, and we regain our middle class status), then I can finish up that last 30 pounds (not that I am not still trying now, but it's harder when under stressful conditions).
I often feel like I am still that 300+ pound girl. I have a bit of body distortion that I think is normal for my situation (160 pound weight loss in 2 years). Then people, who did not know me before, make comments about how I look like some celebrity (Brooke Sheilds and Robin Tunney have been mentioned a bit lately...., heard Margot Kidder and Zooey Deschanel recently too-in high school it was always Brooke Sheilds and Mariel Hemmingway), and I realize I am bit more attractive than I was 2 years ago at 340 pounds. When I tell people, that did not know before, about my weight loss they seem like they don't believe me, until I pull out a picture. It so strange because in my head I am the same person I was two years ago, except I can shop at normal stores and I have way more energy. Even though I have been walking around in this body for a while now, it is still a bit surreal after being so big for so long. I wonder how long it will take to truly get use to?