Tuesday, December 19, 2006
Okay, today´s another good day! Although this time of year is especially challenging with all my up and down emotions, the year is closing dramatically for me. Daughter is coming next week; I´ve lost 20 lbs+ a little more; I´ve gained some new friends and a whole lot of strength; and I continue to grow in mind, body, and spirit. I am in a phase of working through, analyzing, if you will, my life contributions and goals.
I see my past more clearly now; I have worked through a lot of pain and hurt. Through beginning to understand that ALL of my experiences have made me ME - moves, happy beginnings, raising my children, financial difficulties, traumas, intense grief, sadness, depression, finishing my degree, relationship ups, downs, & back-outs, burying a son, letting go of a few deadend relationships, always searching for answers, never giving-in or giving-up, realizations of realities.
I NEVER again want to go through some things. I ALWAYS want to hold onto some things and those special people who love me unconditionally and unselfishly. I am grateful for my children and that they WANT to be with us whenever possible. I love being with them and finding out their thoughts, plans, and goals. I love it when they offer me advice and encouragement. I have learned much from them - they are among my BEST teachers.
I want my kids to be proud of my choices and actions. I want to give them good memories of their relationships with me. They are an inspiration to me and I am so proud to be their Mom!