Tuesday, July 06, 2010
I'm pretty frustrated and stressed right now... I feel VERY much in a slump..not just with the whole not being able to lose weight and going in and out of bouts of discouragement and motivation, but also with life!
There's soo much going on in my life right now, that it's affecting me will to want to workout. I'm struggling A LOT to find a job...I've applied SOOO many places, but still nothing. I know the job market isn't the greatest, but I feel like my degree and training isn't doing ANYTHING for me. I've also gotten connected with people I know who work in the industry I'm trying to get into, and STILL nothing. 4 people around me have all applied for and gotten jobs over the past month and it's just making more and more frustrated! 2 people I know are going to grad school in the next month...It's just frustrating cause I feel like my life is at a stand-still...as i keep pushing against all these brick walls in life, I'm just wearing myself out. It just feels like there's NOTHING I can do to help any situation in my life. I need my boyfriend around, but he's out of state currently, and so that's even taking a toll on me. We talk practically every day, but it's not the same as having him near me. Both of us are struggling to find jobs, so that's slowing down the progress we're trying to make in our relationship.
I feel like screaming!!!!
And even with the weight-loss: I've been doing the Jillian Michael's DVD for 12 days now, and I see a TEENSY toning going on--it's not much. The scale in the past 2 weeks DEFINITELY hasn't moved AT ALL. I feel fat today, and ate fries on account of my stress, but I still managed to eat low-calories today (low end of the scale SP gives me). Other than the fries I had ate REALLY well. I don't know what to do as far as the weight-loss thing, so I keep chugging along, hoping one day (after ALL these days of hard work) that I'll wake up and see the change.
I know the stress isn't helping my situation out either--not that I'm eating bad, but that stress just causes your body to hold on to the weight more. Anyway--it's 10pm and I still need to shower from doing 30 Day Shred and get to bed since I have an early day tomorrow.
PS: Shout out to my grandfather for his birthday--which ever one it is...63 maybe? Just too frustrated to be cheerful and wish someone a happy birthday, so I'll do it tomorrow. I'd hate for my bad mood to spoil someone else's special day!
Have a good night!