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    MADAMEAJA   12,732
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rock and roll and bedpans

Tuesday, June 29, 2010


My coach, two of my running group and me before the start


Running on 1-90


water cop


halfway


walking the last 10 miles took FOREVER


finish line . . . I had tape and a compression sleeve over me knee and also an ice pack held on with plastic wrap . . . sigh

Yeah, that's how crazy my life has been the past few weeks. I was preparing to run the rock and roll marathon, just three weeks after running the green river marathon in early June. I was nursing a few tweaky reminders that 26.2 miles is a long way to go only to have one of them flare up and bite me hard during the rock and roll last Saturday. OK. So I walked nearly half the race. OK. So I'm still icing three days later. But I know that the body is a wonder and I'll recover and run again. Even marathons. The body is a wonder.

My mother in law had a stroke almost two weeks ago. I've put in many bedside hours and am pretty tired of the anxiety and boredom that seem to vie for my attention during these vigils. But watching her make connections to muscles that were not working at all a week ago is something else. And seeing a bit of the spark of the woman who I've known and admired for 30 years makes me hopeful. The brain is a wonder too.

The fact that in the past 20 years she has refused to take medication or make lifestyle changes to battle her high blood pressure has me a little angry too. Catastrophic events like strokes are not usually random, but a build up of unhealthy choices that lead to weaknesses over a long period of time.

I've been thinking about her illness and what it's purpose might be in the grand scheme of things. For me, it's a huge reminder that healthy diet and exercise is key, and not just as a means to and end (a healthy long life), but a means to feeling content every day. My plan right now is simple:
Eat Well
Exercise
Laugh (and cry)
Make connections with people
Meditate

Without the goal of attaining a certain weight, or running a certain distance, or counting calories or fitness minutes, but with the goal that this minute is the most precious because it's the one I'm in right now.

And what's more, being more aware of the present, I'll kiss my husband when he comes home, and I'll stop to pet the dog, check on the flowers I just planted, touch leaves on the trees while I run by, look up at the stars, hug my kids and tell them they're awesome, enjoy the warm breeze and the cool lake, really taste lifes pleasures. Because the obvious just hit me between the eyes last week when MIL had her stroke. We've only got this moment to get it right.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DOTSLADY 7/11/2010 11:32PM

    You said it. My bp has gone down since I gave up dairy. It's funny. When I gave up gluten I didn't know what to eat, so I ate dairy. Now that I've given up dairy, I don't know what to eat, and I just don't (I don't "crave" carrots but eat them anyway, etc). lol I really need to make sure I get enough cals now. I think not eating as much makes a difference in bp, so does getting nutrients. When I think of stroke, I think of B vitamins. See if you can have hers checked.

I SO understand how you feel frustrated at the lack of awareness or caring to change habits. I'm tired of hitting my head against the wall talking to my mom about her and my father's health. Tonight, in fact, I told her if she didn't want to be changing his Alzheimer's diapers, she might really consider all my health talk (just read a good paper about dairy and Huntingtons, which lead to articles about dairy and Alzheimers. THIS does not surprise this person one iota.

We took care and fretted over my MIL, too. Maybe it's a generation thing. It's sad.

BTW, LOVE the race pics. You all look so cute and healthy. How fun to be w/friends. And I hope you feel better soon.
Hope, too, you let 'water emoticon ' know about SP :).

Congrats on your victorious, glorious finish (you finished!)
emoticon

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SHEBADUHKITTY 7/2/2010 2:24PM

    thanks for sharing this, both your pain and your joy are good reminders.

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2BFREE2LIVE 6/30/2010 6:55PM

    emoticon Blog, I loved how you were able to capture the essence of life itself, it is a blessing and we need to enjoy every minute we have as with every moment that passes without our being aware of how we are living and how we are processing what is going on in our lives we are not in control of our most inner self. Thank you for sharing and I hope your MIL will improve each and every day. Sandy

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SCAROUSEL1 6/30/2010 1:02PM

    Thanks for the update on your marathon and you MIL! This is the best blog! It has really made me stop and think and post part of it for my blog today... Thank you!

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