Wednesday, June 23, 2010
I woke up this morning with what can only be described as a "food hangover". You know that feeling you get in the morning, after a night of wild drinking? You open your eyes in the morning, and at first everything feels normal. And then - Pow! That feeling hits you in the pit of your stomach as you start to remember all of the stupid and/or embarassing things you did the night before. You wish you could take it all back, but you can't erase the past. Bummer.
Yep, that was me this morning. Except there was no wild night of drinking. Just some bad food choices. My fiancee and I went to my favorite Mexican restaurant last night. And while there are some really good lite choices on the menu, I just couldn't seem to make one of them. Instead, I indulged in the chips and salsa set before me on the table and picked a dish full of cream cheese and melted cheese and all those things that quickly send our calorie and fat counts over the edge. I was pretty proud of myself when I only ate half of it and took the rest home, however I ruined that moment by finishing it off while watching the 10 o'clock news later in the evening.
So I woke up this morning torturing myself as I was getting ready for work. I was thinking things like, "Why do I do things like that?" "What is wrong with me?" "How could I be so stupid?". But then I began to try to change my thinking, as I am learning to do with SparkPeople. One of my biggest hurdles is learning how to not beat myself up when I make mistakes, and stop dwelling on things that have been done and can't be changed. I started thinking about how I can approach similar situations next time and how I can use last night's mistake as a learning experience.
Then, I decided to find a positive for my day. I went to my closet and pulled out a coat that fit me briefly about 6 years ago during my last big weightloss. I absolutely love this coat and would have gotten rid of it years ago when I got too big to wear it, but my mom (bless her heart) kept it aside for me. I guess she had faith that I might wear it again someday! When I came across it at her house over Christmas, I tried it on and it was nowhere near able to close. Probably 3 or 4 inches from being able to zip. So when I tried it on today, I wasn't expecting to be able to zip it - I just wanted to check my progress. To my amazement, it zipped right up! Success! In all honesty, it's a little snug, but now I know that if I keep on keepin' on, I'll have a great coat to wear when the cold weather comes back!
So today, every time those feelings of regret and negativity start creeping into my mind, I can kick them out by reminding myself of how far I've come, and that little mistakes along the way are okay, because I have the tools to pick myself up and keep going!