Friday, June 18, 2010
I had these wonderful grand plans for June and everything started off well but has now fizzled out. I'm frustrated and upset because I know I'm the one in control of what's happening.
August through May my schedule is set. I'm a teacher. It's normal, there's routine. June and July, I'm home for the summer with my daughters and, well, forget the routine and normalacy. Where before my body knew what time to eat at and when I was and wasn't hungry. Even when I could and couldn't exercise. Stay at home all day and it goes out the window! Now I eat when I'm hungry and I eat untill I'm full. Exercise, not happening. Well, that's not true. I'm exercising minimal amounts. My excuse? It's too hot! I miss my walks but I can't take them in the evenings anymore because it's too hot. Mornings would be great if I got up by 5/5:30 in the morning but when I wake at 6, it's just too hot. I was doing the ea active 30 day challenge again but after day 4 I pulled a muscle in my chest and had to stop for a couple days. There went that one. I'm so frustrated with myself because I know better. I know what I should and should not be doing and yet here I am doing the bad things. Extra ice cream each day. Tortilla chips for breakfast because I have an upset stomach. Eating something light which doesn't fill me up and then over doing it on something not so good. I am still proud of myself in the fact that I am nearly 5 months soda free. That's still an accomplishment but the rest, I don't know. In so many ways I feel like I'm throwing away all my hard work over the last 5 months. I had my goals. I wanted to be successful and now the only person standing in my way is me yet I can't seem to get it together.