All you have to do is watch some eps of Hoarders, Clean House, How Clean is your House? and you quickly see the correlation between disorganization, holding onto outdated stuff, and pure filth as it relates to mental health. Is my home ready to be on an ep of Hoarders? Certainly not, but it does reflect that the last 20 years have not all been hunky dory.
Not to sound sexist (and if you knew me in person you would know that I am 100 percent Feminist) but when a Woman's home becomes a pigstye then you know Houston we have a problem. The home is traditionally the woman's "place" but moreso I think it is women who care about the state of the cave - generally, men don't "get it." If a man has a comfortable bed, a television, a place for his hobbies and a woman to take care of the cleaning, laundry, dishes etc... he's a happy camper.
Yeah there are a few men who care more then their womenfolk; I have a girlfriend's husband who is the Neat Freak, but on the whole (I have three brothers, married for 20 years, and a son), men don't really get worked up when the house is a wreck.
The state of this house reflects many things, some uncomfortable and some flat out sad and disturbing to me.
1.) Financially, this house is a burden to us. We have tried to sell twice and both times the economy shortly collasped (yes we are the cause of 9-11, the Dot.com crash AND the home mortgage collaspe). This makes me angry and I've taken it out on this house by ignoring it.
2.) Caring for a house is a symbol of traditional womanhood. When I met hubby 20 years ago, I had to drop my career and what I had always thought my future would be. Not to gloss over it but this put me in counseling for four years and we almost divorced. There was quite some serious fallout and my role as woman became totally re-defined.
For a long time I resented that, and to this day it comes out by not doing housework for a husband and two kids who generate quite a bit of mess (all three are packrats; I am not).
3.) I'm very sensitive to my environment - so much so that husband would actually clean the house (before kids) because he knew that would improve our bedroom time.
When the house is dirty, messy and disorganized, I feel hopeless, depressed and YUCK. Because of my susceptibility to depression this then becomes a vortex that is hard to pull out of.
So when I post about cleaning, organizing, throwing stuff out --- and even decorating --- it is actually significant to my mental health.
BTW I've spent the entire week cleaning my son's bedroom. About three trash bags later, tons of new storage tubs (over 12, 18 quart tubs of LEGO), and a few pieces of new furniture, his room is now completed.
Details on his room