Friday, May 21, 2010
For the past couple of weeks I've felt uninspired and very much like a loser. I've been of the mindset I've got to muscle my way out of such attitudes; clubbing the lack of motivation over the head and dragging it back to the caves of optimism and motivation. (Poor metaphor, I'm sorry.)
This time, I didn't. Nope. Not intentionally, at least. I was tired and didn't attempt even the tiniest of pulls on my bootstraps. Instead, my friends, I kept at the routines I could do in my sleep and trudged forth. Here I am, on the other side and feeling sooooo much better. I feel strong and capable and though I didn't lose weight this last week, I didn't gain either.
This experience was a new one. I learned that sometimes I'm going to feel out of control. Sometimes I'm going to want to eat every sweet thing under my nose. That sometimes, I'm going to feel like a great big lump and think the worst things of myself. But I'm not any of those things I feel. I am what I do and if I keep to my good habits, I'll generally come out the other side unscathed. I don't need to control every freaking up and down. I can sometimes, sometimes, sometimes, let go and let the habits carry me. Otherwise, what are they good for?