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    DANIGEORGE1908   22,216
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I can't even see the wagon anymore....

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I am back up to 280..that was my starting weight...I am so disgusted with myself. I feel as if I will never be where I want to be. I have no fantasies of being a size 6..i love my curves..I love my boobs....I love my hips and my booty..I just want to put the burgers and fries down and look in the mirror and not see the rolls. I want to be on the outside what I feel in the inside..a bootylicious 12...sometimes I just don't think I will get there..ever..which scares me to death.

I will make the first step and change my weight tracker to 280, very hurtful.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LAWLADY24 7/20/2010 12:45AM

    It is so easy to get upset and throw win the towel...but you can't! Like you said in your profile, take it a day at a time. We aren't looking for a quick fix; we're looking for a lifestyle change. We are all here to support you in this journey. NEVER believe that you are never going to see it. Its at your fingertips. emoticon emoticon

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LAWLADY24 7/20/2010 12:45AM

    It is so easy to get upset and throw win the towel...but you can't! Like you said in your profile, take it a day at a time. We aren't looking for a quick fix; we're looking for a lifestyle change. We are all here to support you in this journey. NEVER believe that you are never going to see it. Its at your fingertips. emoticon emoticon

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LAWLADY24 7/20/2010 12:45AM

    It is so easy to get upset and throw win the towel...but you can't! Like you said in your profile, take it a day at a time. We aren't looking for a quick fix; we're looking for a lifestyle change. We are all here to support you in this journey. NEVER believe that you are never going to see it. Its at your fingertips. emoticon emoticon

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LAWLADY24 7/20/2010 12:45AM

    It is so easy to get upset and throw win the towel...but you can't! Like you said in your profile, take it a day at a time. We aren't looking for a quick fix; we're looking for a lifestyle change. We are all here to support you in this journey. NEVER believe that you are never going to see it. Its at your fingertips. emoticon emoticon

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LAWLADY24 7/20/2010 12:44AM

    It is so easy to get upset and throw in the towel...but you can't! Like you said in your profile, take it a day at a time. We aren't looking for a quick fix; we're looking for a lifestyle change. We are all here to support you in this journey. NEVER believe that you are never going to see it. Its at your fingertips.
emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 7/20/2010 12:45:22 AM

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WINDMILL5 5/20/2010 3:16AM

  emoticon I know you are disappointed, but simply STARTING is more than 50% of the journey...

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KEKEIKO 5/18/2010 4:43PM

    Don't give up on you! Certain stresses in life may knock us down but let's get up and go at it again. I lost 50 lbs and put it back on and now I'm starting all over. Yep I sure did beat myself up about it too. You haven't failed ... you only fail if you don't get back up and fight the fight and you're still here with Sparkpeople so you haven't given up. Start off with small goals ... drink 8 cups of water. You can do this!

Hugs,
Keke

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PEARLSOFJANNAH 5/18/2010 3:47PM

    You know what? The same thing happened to me. I had to start over this year. All the progress that I made last year was gone.

I got started and now I've gone lower than I did last year in less time. Sometimes a bump in the road makes you lose sight of the finish line but as long as you keep driving, you'll get there.

Besides, if you had given up completely, you would not have changed your tracker at all. You wouldn't even be here.

emoticon emoticon

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TAYLORLIV31 5/18/2010 3:24PM

    Don't wallow in self pity it will keep you right where you are. YOu have to get psych'ed and make changes gradually that you can keep. If you don't like fruit, get a blender and make smoothies.......It has helped me lose 10 pounds along with getting on my treadmill and listenning to my ipod. You can do anything you want, are you going to do something meaningfull for yourself. Come on girl! We are all in this to win and become better for ourselves. Let's do this together. emoticon Remember take one day at a time and don't focus on everyday or you will burn out fast.

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PEZZY84 5/18/2010 2:58PM

    I have been there, dont let it keep you down. You cant go back and change anything in the past but you can change what happens from today forward.

If I can do it, I know you can do it. emoticon

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DARLENEK04 5/18/2010 1:48PM

  Listen my friend, take this from one who knows. YOU can and
YOU will do this.
Don't beat yourself to death over something that happened
yesterday and the day before.

NOBODY ever said this would be easy.

WHAT I would like to point out to you, this is a process to
get healthy and make healthy choices. It is not a journey
to be in a size 12 or 8, by next week.

You didn't put the weight on in a week. Therefore, you will not
take it off in a month.
Yes, it will take work and using your head about what you eat.

I will tell you this also, I am older than you, and PLEASE,
do not wait until your health begins to fail, as has mine,
before you begin to control your appetite.

I have Arthritis in all major joints, exercise, even walking is
sometimes quite painful.
I have high blood pressure, WORSE-I am on the verge of DIABETIS.
AND WORSE YET, I have kidney problems caused by the very meds
they put me on for the Arthritis.

Come-on, we can do this...you are definitely worth the effort
it will take. It means your life and quality of that life.

If I can help, sparkmail me.
Darlene

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BASTET0330 5/18/2010 12:27PM

    Don't beat yourself up too much. I think we've all been there. (Well. All of us with lives/drama/families to balance as well as a full-time workout regimen. Sometimes the weight loss drops by the wayside.) It sounds like your self-esteem's taking a bit of a beating right now, and that can be dangerous in a couple ways. Speaking as a foodie, when I get stressed and decide I'll never be thin, so there's so point in trying, I tend to wind up eating. Do you have any special outfits that still make you feel like a million bucks? Wear them. Do you have special people who make you feel cheerful and loved, whether you're size 2 or size 250? See them, and laugh a little. Do you have a favorite feel-good activity that always recharges you, whether reading or movies or video games? Do that for a while.

Sorry for the epic-length comment, but I'm kind of where you are right now, and it sucks. But...this, too, shall pass, and things can get better, right? Right. Confucius said, "Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising again when we fall." Best of luck!

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