Thursday, April 29, 2010
I'm on the second day of my quit. It's harder than I ever imagined. The part of my brain that is addicted to cigarettes tells the most amazing lies.
Last night, on my last break at work it was at it's worst:
it was telling me that bumming a cigarette would not be so bad, because I wouldn't smoke again "I promise".
Plus, one cigarette does not mean I'm a smoker again.
It's not a big deal, did you really think you'd NEVER smoke EVER again?
Don't you miss smoking?
Wasn't it nice?
You're stressed out because of that last call, a smoke is the only way you're gonna de-stress.
Everyone knows how hard it is to quit, and no one is going to be upset with you if you fall on the way. (which is probably true, but still just a ploy to get me to smoke)
Fortunately I had a friend I could talk to. I told him all about the devious addicted part of my brain. Initially he was vehement in reminding me there was no way in hell he was gonna let me smoke. Then he laughed at that part of my brain. Like I would believe any of the crap it was spouting.
I DID start to believe it before I asked for his help. But now that I look back on last night, while that part of my brain is being mercifully quiet, I see why he laughed. How ludicrous those lies were/are. If Someone else was saying those things out loud to me, I could see the Con a mile away. But it's so much harder when it's coming from inside.
Something no one really told me about. But I'm hanging on. Still no cigarette, and it should get easier every time I tell my addicted brain "NO!"
Yay for that!