Tuesday, April 20, 2010
I continue to be struggling with the bug that seems to have vacated the rest of my family. My daughter mentioned tonight that I hadn't gotten any rest or downtime like everybody else took and maybe that is why I am still feeling so badly. I believe that Ihave a strong physical reaction to stress and that has been a big contributor.
I survived Monday and that is big on its own. My day started with some work issues--my boss is upset with the para who works with me because she has asked parents to sign a daily reading log for their children and some of the parents are complaining. She gives the kids stickers each day when it is returned and although it is a more involved program than what I do, it is the same assignment I have always given. She asked me aboutit once, so I shared a form I used in the past, but somehow there are these odd miscommunications that have gone on. I finally just asked her to quit doing the paperwork part of the program and that if any parent contacts were needed that I should be the one making them. I hope that settles this once and for all. I am puzzled why there is turmoil over this, I always had a required reading homework when I was in the classroom that had to be signed off on by a parent and many, many elementary teachers do as well. On top of it, I provide the books for the kids so there is nothing but 20 minutes of time involved. I am confused, but it was an issue the entire day at work yesterday.
Many of you know that my son had a car accident last fall that turned into a financial nightmare because it not only involved the car he hit, but a truck with a boat on a trailer that hit his car and in turn took out a utility pole. The damages went beyond what our insurance would pay--I still believe we were shafted over the cost of the boat that wasn't even fastened to the trailer that flew off and tore out the pole. Anyway, in order to manage this debt, my husband and I filed a Chapter 13 debt reconstruction. This opened up a nightmare for us with our primary mortgage people and they seem to want our home out of the deal. We had to scurry and provide a lot of paperwork for our attorney to deal with this and this entire issue has made me a wreck. We are a bit behind on our payments, but that is because I am out of sick leave and my salary is next to nothing--the arrears were also put into the plan so they will get their money. None of this is about getting out of any of our debts, just making things manageable for us. Our lawyer is handling it but until I know this is resolved, I am not going to rest.
My son lost his job yesterday over eating a day old donut the store was going to throw away. That is exactly the reason and of course, they are calling it theft. This is my same son who I have taken the computer away from and who has a multitude of other issues. I scheduled an appointment with his boss and my son and husband and I went to try to work something out. The man was congenial and he decided to look further into it and get back to us today. The answer was "no" and my son is now left dangling in the wind. I tried to explain both the fact that he has untreated AD/HD--untreated right now because he has no health insurance any more, even though he has worked for this company 5 days a week, 8 hours a day for almost 2 years, they considered him as "part time." I really feel badly because he had been sick like everyone else, but they require a doctor's note for an absence, so he went to work anyway. He found himself to be hungry at 4 AM after all of the vomiting and diarrhea of the past few days and he was without money, so he got one of these darn donuts they were going to throw away. It sure seems wrong to take his job over that, but that is how it went.
Finally, my recent job status looks as if I may not have any chance to transfer somewhere else in the fall. I just cannot even consider spending anymore time being mistreated, maligned, and abused...yet jobs are so important these days since there is such a shortage of them. With the thing going on over our finances, I am lost right now. The very core of our lives are being challenged in every possible way.
I was a total mess yesterday as all of this drama unfolded. I barely slept and have been so nauseated that I have had to foce decent nutrition on myself. I spent as much time in prayer as I could and I also made sure to go to the pool. I took a bit of a nop tonight and for the first time in 3 days, I am not freezing, so maybe this is coming to an end. I believe that my prayers are being answered and I must assume that the Lord has something in mind for my son. I knew changes in his life were needed, but I sure wasn't prepared for this one.
Forgive me if I haven't been myself or visited threads or responded to all of the love you have shown me. I am trying, but this hasn't been much fun. If my body would get better, I would probably be better with the stress. I need a good cry, but nobody around here wants to witness that and a cry is no good if you have to sneak around to have one. I see my back doctor tomorrow and I have alot ridingon the outcome of this. It will help to know exactly what this trouble is all about--the same old stuff and damage flaring vs. something new and nasty. Neither is a good alternative and I have no idea what will be needed in either situation because I need some relief from the increase of pain I have had since early February. Again, I am leaving all of this in Gof's hands because He is the only one with hands big enough to hold it all.
Sending gentle hugs to you all...and my plans to be better soon!!