Slow progress! But moving forward...
Friday, April 16, 2010
Well the weather is cooling and the flea problem has settled down for now. I am so grateful. The mouse problem is still here but I have now put out bait. Only problem with that is the smell of death and inability to find the little bodies UGH!! I was wrong about the kittens and cat under the house. Mother cat is pregnant again and two babies play in my yard. Yes of course I have to feed them SIGH! Wouldn't you?
So the cat that drowned was one I didn't know and the fleas appear to be all over the poor kittens and cat as they scratch and bite at themselves all the time. Poor things!
I'm such a sucker for animals LOL
Getting the house ready for sale is slow and tedious. To get the amount I need there is much to do. I miss my man so much but we talk nearly every day. As we have both had time changes it is more difficult though. With the pregnancy I can't stay up to all hours of the night. I bomb out not long after dark. Doh!
I have our bubs heartbeat now...
Which of course was sent straight to Daddy via msgr to go on his mobile. On Tuesday I have my ultrasound. I waited until the 20-21 week so we would see our baby's features more clearly and find out if its a boy or a girl. I can't wait! I have been feeling bub moving for quite a few weeks now which is comforting, though being comfortable in bed is another matter LOL. I have still not gained any weight and I am so grateful. Normally by now I would be getting the when are you due questions and the oh I thought you must be ready to drop... grrrr! So... so grateful not to have that again. I just look like I have a bit of a belly but thinner face.
My other news which I have had to wait to share is that a few weeks after I have my 4th child, my daughter Eve is due to have her 1st child. I will be a grandmother. It weighs heavily on both Patrik and I that I will not be here for her. It really sux! Its hard enough to help her just being 1 1/2 hours away from her. Trying to get the house stuff done. Trying to be careful with the pregnancy and not strain my body. Trying to help Eve as much as I can. Trying to be there for my eldest daughter Jess while she goes through her own struggles. Waiting for Jess and Eve to bond better so I know that they will support each other when I am not here. Having constant issues with my youngest daughter Faith. She is now nearly 6 and has the attitude problems of a teen. I feel so overwhelmed and strained quite often and just keep trying to move forward.
I often get asked when I am moving over to Sweden by friends. Its so hard because I do not have that answer. I will get there when I get there. That's all I can say. I try to not get depressed about it. I know that if I take a little longer and do things right then our future will be more secure. I need the money to fund my aquaponics in Sweden. Without it I worry on how we will struggle financially. So rush I must not. I am just setting my mind to be as healthy as possible and just keep doing what needs to be done. I know that it will all work out in the end because I have faith and hope! And the love of my soulmate! Striving forwards!!!!