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Tired of Excuses

Friday, March 26, 2010

Today I bumped into someone I used to volunteer with. We hadn't seen each other since I started my journey and she commented on my weight loss. When I told her what she'd been doing, she said, "Oh, it's easy for you, you have discipline."

My birth family constantly makes similar comments. The reality is no one is born with discipline. I mean, seriously, have you ever seen a disciplined baby?

Why do people find it easier to claim losing weight is easy for someone else 'cause they like exercise or have the discipline to stick with it?

There are days I HATE the idea of going to the gym. But, I know if I don't, it will be easier and easier to miss my workouts. It's the same with eating unhealthy food. There are times (although fewer as time goes on) when choices look good to me, but I know they're going to lead to a spiral of making other poor decisions.

Any suggestions to what to say?
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I agree, it's really frustrating to hear "oh, it's easy for you because..." regardless of what the "because" is.

    I guess my response (right now) would be, "Actually, it's not easy for me at all, but I do it because I want to be healthy."

    I'm aiming for a time when my response would be more like what someone else wrote, "It wasn't always easy for me." (Meaning, I hope it will get easier at some point, LOL!)

    And I totally agree that hearing "Good for you, you look great!" would be so much nicer than any version of why they think it's "easy" for you.
    2890 days ago
    I think I would respond to a comment like that with something like, "Sorry, simple discipline isn't part of the equation. Losing weight is like any other important goal. I had to dedicate myself to making changes in many spheres of my life (routine, daily doings, etc) and it has NOT been easy."

    Or maybe, just, "Oh, I wish that were true."

    I think comments of this ilk are because they don't know what else to say. Too bad they can't simply come up with, "Good for you, you look GREAT!"

    ...cuz you do!

    2890 days ago
    "Discipline? I call it commitment."
    "Perhaps I do have some discipline, but I had to find it."
    "Overall discipline now, created by many small steps."
    "Less discipline than knowing what I want and taking steps toward getting it."

    2891 days ago
    You could say: "Discipline is a formed habit.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon Keep up the good work!
    2891 days ago
    Each person has to be ready to make the choice to change their lives.
    2891 days ago
    I would just encourage them to give it a try realizing that unless, and until, they find the desire in themselves to change -- they probably won't do so. My sister told me about Sparkpeople in August, I joined in October, '09, but didn't actually "do" anything with it until the end of February this year. I had to come to the realization within my own mind that I needed to make some serious changes. I am now motivated and have a strong desire to succeed. The desire doesn't come from wanting to be like someone else, but rather from wanting to change myself for the better -- for ME!

    Keep your chin up and don't let the negative naysayers get you down! You've done fabulous!! emoticon
    2891 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/27/2010 12:13:16 AM
    I don't know what I'd say. My first reaction would be to strike out but some people are so dense they wouldn't even pick up on it.

    I may have to get back to you on this one. Depends on how much time you want to spend explaining to the person what your daily schedule is like to achieve your goals.

    But what it truly comes down to is their inadequacy and they have to make your hard work more trivial to make themselves feel better.
    2891 days ago
    Discipline is like all those other muscles we strengthen...we all have known very flabby days of!

    It's like I've been saying an awful lot these days:

    Being healthy and fit is hard
    Being obese is hard

    Choose your hard...

    Hey, it's clear what YOU'VE chosen...! :-)

    2891 days ago
    Hmm. I usually get the "it's easier for you because you live alone and don't have to chase kids around" - and I actually agree that not having to consider other people is convenient for structuring my food and exercise.

    But I've rarely heard that I have inherently more discipline. Maybe because people KNOW me too well... LOL

    If someone did say that to me, I suppose I'd come back with, "well, it wasn't always that way - I've had to work really hard on that."
    2891 days ago
    I 100% agree with you. When they want to stop making excuses they will change. Good for you!!!
    2891 days ago
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