Monday, March 08, 2010
I've joined a number of Teams. I try to be active in all of them but I will admit that I just like to visit and read what everyone is writing about.
I joined the Petite Women's team (I am 5ft [on a good day]) and today while I was reading some of the messages it dawned on me, I AM NOT PETITE!
I used to be.
I feel I am on the inside.
I want to be again.
I started to think I shouldn't be part of the team, I have no right to mingle with these tiny ladies. But I have such conflicting feelings. All my life I've been short but I never felt "tiny". I always felt fat, even at 94lbs at age 18. I need to have a self-image makeover.
I know that I am on the way to a healthier me and all that, but what is going to change? At each step I am not going to be satisfied and want to keep going, but when will that end? When will I be satisfied with what I see in the mirror?
I am basically a self confident person, so it is not a simple matter of gain self confidence with weight loss. What is going to be different this time?
I guess I am not looking for the single answer here, I'm just spouting out my thoughts. I hope I am a bit more mature than I was at 18 and can adjust.
Here's to being short and loving it!