There is a piece of gym equipment (a machine) at my fitness studio that is called the WAVE. The WAVE combines the elliptical type floating feel with skating (your feel glide out laterally like you're skating).

I had been courting it from a distance for weeks. I hadn't seen anybody on it, yet it looked like it might be fun. So one day I took the leap, skipped the elliptical and headed for the WAVE. There were probably eight pairs of eyes on me...no doubt wondering what the machine is like too and if I would survive.

I held on for dear life, climbed up onto the steps and pressed quickstart. HOLY HELL! I frantically tried to slow the speed down and succeeded at reaching a manageable pace...ok...I got this!..Yah....I can do this......................(4 minutes go by).........I can't do this......okay 1 more minute!

IT.WAS.HARD.

But awesome...that is until I tried to get off. How do I get off this? I tried stepping off to the right but my left leg skated away from my body. I regained my bearings and thought it out. "Look you....let me off!"

If a gym machine could smirk...this one was definetely smirking.

I tried again, and launched myself ass over tea kettle onto the floor. "Bloody machine" I thought. I heard a few gasps from the ladies in the gym and I groaned "I'm still alive" while still lying on the floor.

I got up, limped away and finished the rest of my workout. But before I left for the day I walked up to that machine and said "meet me here tomorrow at 10am...you're going down bitch!" turned and walked away.

I am glad to report the after some serious bruises (only on my part) we have now made up and become friends spending 5-8 minutes together almost every day. Although I still catch it smirking once in a while.