Thursday, March 04, 2010
This morning as I was getting the kids ready to drive to school, we noticed our darling Lhasa, Abby, was shaking. My daughter was concerned, and was like "Something's wrong with Abby" and I said, "She's probably just cold. She's okay," and then, just from lying there, Abby went beserk, She was howling and yelping, like screaming. She jumped up like something was stabbing at her, and her eyes were wild, it was like she was screaming. I was just stunned and so unprepared. I have never seen anything like that, and I hope I never see naything else like it again.. She went on like that for a long time, maybe thirty seconds, but it felt so long, --and then she just lay there panting with her mouth open and whimpering, and she didn't want to be touched. I thought, "She's having a muscle spasm, like a Charlie horse" and after a few minutes of us just talking gently to her, she stopped whimpering and just lay there, looking at us like "What happened? What was that?"
I had to get the kids to school, (it was 6:45 in the morning) and the vet opens at 8, so I called my mom--angel that she is--to come babysit the dog so Abby wouldn't be alone. My mom was an LPN, so I feel like she is better in a medical crisis anyway. Abby went to her favorite "don't bother me" spot under my bed, and didn't come out for an hour. My mom made arragements so we took Abby to the vet as soon as I got back, She is very nervous at the vet's, and she was drooling and shaking.
Come to find out, she has a strained muscle in her back. So she is on painkillers and muscle relaxers, and it is so much better, but she is still holding her tail down (I guess it hurts her back to hold it up) and just moves slow. Poor baby.
Anyway, my daughter was bawling all the way to school, on and off--I really thought about keeping her home, but I thought it was best for Abby to be left alone and Willow would want to hold her and soothe her. I cannot tell you how upsetting all this was--it makes me cry just remembering it. Abby is the best pet in the world, and seeing her writhing in pain like that and not being able to stop it--that was like a nightmare.
I had this urge to eat something salty and crunchy. So I powered through some carrot sticks I had packed in my bag. But it wasn't enough. I actually stopped at a 7-11 on the way home and bought a bag of selt-and pepper Kettle chips --a little bag. I consciously decided to have that little bag and thought that would do it. But no, I came home and opened a big bag of potato chips and proceeded to eat half the bag. I am amazed I stopped at half. I could have eaten the world.
I know that urge I had to eat was purely my way of dealing with these intense emotions. I was trying to be rational, but it really overwhelmed me that it might be something serious and she could die. And my daughter would be devastated. And i would be, too.
So, I am forgiving myself for the face-first dive into the Lays. And, I gotta tell you, it worked. I felt better. And I let it make me feel better, instead of piling on a full-frontal emotional smack-down on myself for slipping up. And that calorie-laden detour did not inspire a day-long free-for-all. It's behind me, and I would probably do it all over again in the same circumstances. Someday, I may do a yoga pose instead but I haven't learned any yoga yet. So, I'm blogging it out and dealing with it. That kind of stressful situation is not an every-day occurance. I could have dealt with it in a more positive way, but --it is what it is. Moving on.
My planned work out at the Y ended up not happening, as i was in the vet's office. So I am off to do a little bit of exercise here at home on the Wii Fit.
Thanks for all the support, everybody. Just knowing you are reading this and care--that makes me feel a little bit better.