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    EVER-HOPEFUL   134,143
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time to snap out of it.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

first i want to thank all my spark friends for putting up with my bad mood,depression etc this week each and everyone of you.it has been a real tough week for me and i hit rock bottom yesturday.as you can see by my name i am not one to stay at rock bottom for long as i will soon want to fight my way out of it.it is just sometimes you have to get all the way to rack battom before you can get the engy,willpower,gumption or what ever you want to call it to snap out of it.i think with what has been going on in my life this week it is understandable that i got down,if i hadnīt i would have probably worried thinking something was wrong with me.so for thoes who donīt know what my week has been like i will go over it.i need to do this to tell myself that what i was feeling yesturday was perfectly normal so i donīt beat myself up over it and the 4lb weight gain this week.that is right 4lb+and then to move on.

monday my husband went into hospital and was opeated on on tuesday.because of family history the thought of the op terrified me and added extra stress for me.the hospital he is in is a hour travel away which is cutting into a already tight scedule.ihave had to deal with the kids,house etc all on my own.i know lots of people do that,there are lots of single parents out there and i admire them very much.but how many of them have three children with special needs,needing physio therapy everyday along with other therapyīs.on top of that we are all ill this week with coughs,me included which has really affected zakariyaīs and aymans asthma.on top of that thursday i fell on the slippery pavement outside and along with my pride i hurt my foot(it is still swollen),my shoulder and coxīs.i also have a stiff neck.in the last 8 nights there hasnīt been a night that i havenīt slept more than three hours as the kids coughing ,asthma attacks etc have been worse in the night with the lying down.on top of that on the u-bahn on thursday a drunk man started molesting a 70 year old,no one step in so i did .he then started being abusive to me saying who do you think you are mother theresa and having ago at my head scarf etc.donīt forget i had my 1 yearold on my knee as well.anyway the man wouldnīt go away so i stayed on the train till the old lady reach her stop as i would not have felt right leaving her alone at the drunks mercy.it is amasing how some people just look away as the train was full.i suppose i should be thankful he was just going on at my head scarf and didnīt start on my weight.anyway because of that when i got to the hospital i had 15mins left to visit my man as i had to go back to pick up zakariya and ayyub from tagesheim and kindergarten.then yesturday i hit an all time low because i couldnīt go and visit my husband it was the first time since he had been in hospital.also we thought he would be home tomorrow but the dr said he wont be home before monday and thatb is not certain.anyway that has roughly been my week ,i have also been constaintly eating to keep me going as i am soo,sooo tired as a result of being ill and lack of sleep.

but today,enough is enough.i went on the scales(should have been yesturday but i put it off)and have put on 4lbs.first thing this morning i had a nicebath to help me feel more refreshed and to signal a new clean strart yet again.i had a bowl of muesili with 0.3% milk,i plan to do nudles in a tomatoe sauce and a small piece of chicken for lunch and will probably do a soup for dinner.for snacks i plan low fat yougarts and fruit.lets hope i can stick to it.i havenīt exercised since thursday when i had the fall,out of normal walking when doing chores etc,so plan to start again today.i am sitting on a stability ball while writting this.it is better than nothing and now must try and think of what exercise to do that wont hurt too much with my foot,shoulder,neck and cox.any suggestion would be really appreciated.once again i want to thank each and everyone of you for being there as i needed you most.you are all
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JULINC 2/22/2010 9:09AM

    I'm sorry that you had such a stressful week ((((((HUGS))))))) I am sure that the older lady on the train was thankful that you were kind enough not to ignore her situation.

This is a new week -- I hope this one will be less stressful for you!!!!!

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QUEENGP 2/21/2010 5:29PM

    Karen...WOW!!! you have had some week! My love and thoughts are coming to you in bucketfuls. I loved how you started this week with a refreshing bath. I wish I was there to help you, but know in my heart of hearts that I am thinking about you.
You are a very brave woman, to say the least. Not many people would have stayed there and helped out someone in that kind of trouble. I am glad you did not seriously hurt yourself in the fall, just ice down your ankle and wrap it in bandage, that should help. I hope you start feeling better as well really soon!!!!!!! I hope this week is better for you as you have already started it off on a good note. Take a deep breath, cause this week has got to be better than last week...Love, Genia emoticon

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JAZZERCISEGENIE 2/21/2010 8:37AM

    I do hop this week is better. So sorry and support is here from all of us.

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JCARDINAL 2/20/2010 2:13PM

    Just think Karen that bad week is over! New week fresh start. You CAN do this just stay strong! Go Bahama Mamas!!!

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MANDALIN787 2/20/2010 1:58PM

    emoticon for you Karen!! You have had a crazy week but made it through okay and stronger for it!

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PATTYCAKE49 2/20/2010 1:29PM

    Thank you for taking care of the lady on the train. I admire you for taking care of your three special needs children. You have your plate full with all of that and you are trying to lose weight, too. I know that would be hard for me to do. I think that you are a strong woman, so you will be able to lose the weight.

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JUDITH1654 2/20/2010 1:21PM

    Bless you for staying with that woman! You WILL be rewarded!

And so sorry for all the other issues you are having to deal with. You must be a very strong individual for God to allow you to endure that. "That which doesn't break us, makes us stronger."

Keeping you and your family in our thoughts and prayers. emoticon

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LADYSNOWFALL 2/20/2010 12:21PM

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I am sorry it's been such a rough week! But, I am sure that you are stronger for it! I found a saying recently that says, "God only puts in front of us what he will carry us through".

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LOOZINITNOW 2/20/2010 10:14AM

    I am so sorry your week was crazy! But, you are one strong woman and I know you will make the most of this next week! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JFROGDIVA 2/20/2010 7:26AM

    My dear, sweet, friend.........you are very brave to stay & help that lady.........THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! Not many people would care or inconvenience themselves for another!!!!!!!! I am like you, I can't stand BULLIES!!!!!!!! When I was young, I got bullied alot & my ex-hubby was abusive, so I know what that is like!!!! I am sorry that you had such aq rough week!!!! I have asthma, so can relate!!!! Tough to deal with sometimes!! Hope you feel better soon & kiddies are better soon too!!!! You are to be admired for having 3 special kiddies to raise.......most people couldn't deal with raising one!!!! As for exercise, why not start with upper body stuff like wall pushups, or dumbbell wrist curls or something like that?? I don't know how you can sit on a stability ball with a sore behind..........I can't sit on one at all!!!! LOL LOL!!!! emoticon emoticon
Hope you have a great day & hope Hubby is home & better soon!!!!

Hugzz ~ Jae emoticon

Comment edited on: 2/20/2010 7:28:04 AM

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MARIMAC13 2/20/2010 6:30AM

    Wow, and I thought I was having a rough week. Hope your foot feels better soon. And thank you for staying on the train with the lady. I can't get over how most people just look the other way. IDIOTS!!! Have a great day, and an even better weeek.

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SUSIEPH1 2/20/2010 5:13AM

    Hello My Freind, you have really been in the wars havn't you? so sorry you have hurt your self on top of all the other problems.. You were very brave to help and stay with that poor lady,Not many would.
I hope tomorrow is a better day for you Karen .. Take care my love xx Love Susie and Bobby

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MUSIC66 2/20/2010 4:10AM

    sorry you hurt your self and all tha you have been through, for your foot you should try deep heat or ice gel or simiar that you can buy in germany. sorry about your childerns asthma is acting up again hope they are better soon it will be spring there soon.

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