Advertisement -- Learn more about ads on this site.


    JCORYCMA   13,598
SparkPoints
10,000-14,999 SparkPoints
 
 
As the Spark Turns: My Affair

Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Yes. It's true, Spark friends. I had an affair.

Let me start at the beginning...

I met him at the gym soon after I joined. I was attracted to him immediately. He was friendly and... Inviting. He beckoned me. He was smooth and suave and encouraged me to be comfortable with my body. I had nothing to be ashamed of. Next thing I knew I was standing before him wearing nothing but the tiny threadbear towel that the Y provides. I was so nervous the first time. I don't know why. I felt like a loser but he made me feel like a winner.
I was orgasmic!

I quickly became obsessed. I wanted to see him every day. And everyday after my workout, I'd use the bathroom, shower off my sweat with a scented shower gel and slip up on him wearing nothing but that tiny towel...

He knew what I was thinking. I didn't even have to speak. Did I feel down?, he murmured. Why? Because, I answered, I did everything right. I watched what I ate. I exercised. I wanted to be thin for him. I thought about him all the time...

But after a while, I started slipping. I was afraid to face him. I got dressed right after my shower and didn't visit him.

He accused me of ignoring him. I DIDN'T ignore him. I ate a tenderloin with onions last night. I didn't want to offend him. He cooed -- cajoled -- tempted me. Truth or Dare. Until I agreed once again to strip and ...
I climbed on him and locked eyes. Gently holding my breath as I caressed his arm. Slowly sliding it across. Gasp! I opened my eyes and he was smiling. I was still that loser that felt like a winner. He helped me dodge a bullet.
Confident that I was THE ONE, the special one, I watched as another woman flirted with him. She tried to get that smile from him but ultimately turned away spurned and looked forlorn.
"Down?", I asked "No", she sighed. "I don't even know why I bother"! With a smirk I thought to myself I didn't know why she bothered either...

All was fine for awhile. I quietly repeated my ritual with him everyday. Ecstatic after seeing him. Riding home from the gym on a high.
But ---
It didn't last. He eventually became more and more demanding. Jealous. Possessive. He accused me of spending more time on the treadmill. Forgetting about him. I tried to reassure him that with my workout taking a little longer, I just had to hustle to get home. I didn't want my husband to get worried and suspicious. I promised that I would try and spend time with him -- at least once a week if not more.

He pouted. When I did see him he wouldn't let me lose like he always had. He groaned when I tried to take his arm and I kept having to move it further away. I felt guilty at first. I had cheated on him with some french fries after all and not even the extra time spent with treadmill compensated. I vowed to not look lustfully after ANYTHING else - ever again.
He forgave and for awhile things stayed the same.

Until....

I caught him with that other woman. She had JUST came away from him and SHE was smirking! I held my head high as I marched past her and came up to him clutching the towel that barely covered my nakedness. I had nothing to be ashamed of. Didn't he always tell me that? It was true this time. I had been perfect. Thought of him and only him. I got on with confidence. Slowly I moved his arm to my usual favorite spot. He didn't respond. I nudged it a little further. Nothing. Panic started to set in. Confusion. You don't understand ---
I WAS PERFECT!!! How could he treat me this way? I was tempted to drop my tiny towel and humiliate myself right there in the women's locker room at the Y. Falling into my old pattern I started frantically searching my mind for what I could have done wrong. Why, I asked him, Why? What did I do to deserve this?
I must have looked dejected because smirking woman looked at me and said, "Plateau?"

Huh? I was in a daze. I looked at her and she went on, "I think he gets tired of seeing less and less of us", she chuckled at her own joke.

"It's OK", I said with false bravado, "Muscle weighs more than fat".

She burst out laughing. "How can that be? A pound is a pound is a pound..."
Only it didn't sound like mirthful laughter but more like mocking cruelty. I thought about it as I slowly dressed and she departed with a cheery wave. She was right! Weight is weight. No matter what HE says. One pound weighs one pound.

I turned and looked at him and I SWEAR he was smirking...

How could I be so stupid? I asked myself as I jerked open my car door. I felt guilty. Not for cheating on HIM. For cheating on myself. For not recognizing the signs. I was obsessed. I was self-centered and as addicted as any addict.
I didn't just not recognize the signs. I ignored them. What signs? The signs I was making progress despite "his help" ---

My clothes : emoticon My arms and legs: emoticon

Instead of emoticon on the treadmill, I was emoticon

I was eating emoticon emoticon and emoticon good!

I didn't need HIM to make me feel emoticon about myself!

I got home and confessed the whole saga to my husband. My obsession. My highs. My lows. The woman reminding me that a pound weighs a pound. He stopped me right there. He dug in the closet and came out with a small compact sphere of metal. He handed it to me and it was slightly heavy. It's a one pound weight he told me -- from one of his teaching science kits. He put it on the counter and got out the two BIG 8 oz. bags of marshmallows from the pantry and laid them beside the weight. They took up a goodly portion of the counter. A pound weighs a pound he said, but look at how condensed one is compared to the other. See? Muscle can weigh the same but take up a heck of a lot less room!

So even though HE said I wasn't a loser anymore, I was still a winner because I WAS thinner!

That did it. The next day after my workout I marched past him to the shower and when he called out asking if I was going to stop and see him I gave him an icy stare and said, Not today. Not tomorrow. Maybe NEVER!

Ultimately, Spark friends. I gave in and assigned visitation rights on Monday -- at work -- fully clothed -- on his compadre Mr. Digital. He doesn't coo and cajole. He spits up a number and I loosely pay attention to it to insure that I'm not way off base. Otherwise, I watch my tracker to see if I'm staying in my calorie range. I notice the thighs of my favorite jeans -- still loose and comfy? Could I climb those stairs with the basket of laundry and not give it a second thought?

AND I made myself a pact to never stray again.

Yep. The Love Affair with
Is OVER!
SHARE
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WILLOWWEAVER 3/4/2010 5:09PM

    Are you a writer? What a great blog! and perfect timing as I had not even been on a scale for a long time and gained the weight all back. Now was beginning to get on the scale and worry about the numbers. What a great reminder! thank you! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JOESSWEEPEA 2/26/2010 4:42PM

    Absolutely loved this! It reminds me once again not to hate the words "lean muscle mass"

Report Inappropriate Comment
_MAOMAO_ 2/25/2010 11:30PM

  I'm ROFLMAO! Oh, that is so good. I just love it, thank you!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NEED2DROP50 2/23/2010 10:42PM

    Loved this!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUNADRAGON 2/21/2010 3:24PM

    Fun!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NWFL59 2/16/2010 5:23PM

    emoticon Thanks for the blog, I enjoyed reading it!

Report Inappropriate Comment
THEQUEENBEE333 2/15/2010 5:16PM

    LOL! Loved it! Make this week great!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHRISSYKNITTER 2/14/2010 7:34PM

    Very cute story...and a GREAT reminder!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRISHP1961 2/13/2010 9:08PM

    Are you a writer by profession? This is very well done...

Report Inappropriate Comment
KERENSALMW 2/13/2010 5:06PM

  Great story. I loved it. You really made my day. Thanks for sharing

Report Inappropriate Comment
RUSTYSHAW1 2/13/2010 3:45AM

    What a fantastic story! You had me going for a while...then I got to thinking...no way would you write about an..."affair"...love the style in which you expressed approaching a very 'tantalizing goal'...LOL...weight loss. Well done. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MRSZIPPY1001 2/12/2010 12:34PM

  What a first great story for me to come upon...right up my alley! I love to write and I can so relate to this story - its hilarious! Can't wait to read the rest. Love your sense of humor...and I so "get that". emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TEDYBEAR2838 2/11/2010 9:45PM

    GreatPost Thank YOU!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SIMPLELIFE4REAL 2/11/2010 7:34PM

    Very cute! Thanks for taking the time to write it. You make such a good point!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FLORIDAFLUTIST 2/11/2010 3:50PM

    What a clever and humorous way to describe your experience; I love it!
Congratulations on your success!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIFFANY_SUZANNE 2/11/2010 3:43PM

    If you aren't inspiration, I don't know what is.

Oh and have I mentioned lately how much I adore your hubby?!? emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALESHABEE 2/11/2010 12:52PM

    OMG!!! I love this!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MEOWROWRIE 2/11/2010 12:47PM

    What a terrific post! This was really well written and very funny! I need to stop my own love affair with the numbers!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GETTINSEXIBACK 2/11/2010 12:08PM

    great story, I think we can totally relate. I didn't lose any weight this week, but my body fat decreased by 3.4% ...dropping marshmallows getting stronger is OK with me this week.

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANIKA34 2/11/2010 10:29AM

    GREAT Blog! Made my day just to read it! Thanks for sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FREDDY1232 2/11/2010 1:33AM

    Very good blog. You had me going until the end. Good writing Thanks for this one. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KMPHILLIPS1988 2/10/2010 8:26PM

    Wow I had no idea where you were going with it til i saw the picture at the end! lol Very creative way to tell a story most of us have!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SANTANDERE 2/10/2010 8:23PM

    I loved reading your blog. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
G-MAMICK 2/10/2010 4:10PM

    Wow, this captures my "affair" with the same creature exactly. Right now it's so bad that every time I get up in the middle of the night to pee I weigh myself. It's so stupid! It's a digital scale and the light turns on when I step on it, so I close the bathroom door so my husband doesn't know what's going on, because I know that this is wrong, wrong, wrong. How do you put an end to this affair? emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
OPAL50 2/10/2010 1:55PM

    Best and funniest (and truest) blog I've read all day. Thanks, I'm a fan!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JASCAT0507 2/10/2010 1:13PM

    That was AWESOME!!! I have to keep that in mind daily. The scale tells me I didn't lose weight but my clothes feel better and better. Thanks for sharing, I love the way you put it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PTREINER 2/10/2010 12:29PM

  Funny blog! I put away my home scale, which I used like an addict every day, and made a pact to weigh once a week only at the gym. That worked out great until the scale became unbalanced - on the heavy side! So, until it gets fixed, I'm using the clothes-fitting, can-I-add-more-weight/time-to-my-wo
rkout method of weighing myself. But I hope it gets fixed soon because I like to record the numbers on my tracker and see how close I'm getting to my next reward! Thanks for the story, the humor, and your message.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIMENESU 2/10/2010 1:27AM

  WOW... GOOD FOR YOU emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ORANGEAID2 2/9/2010 8:38PM

    LOL! I avoid my scale like a bad ex that you never want to see again! I need to go back to attending our weekly assigned visits tho...just to make sure we address some yet unanswered questions.

Report Inappropriate Comment
RUNNING4MEXICO 2/9/2010 8:17PM

    Oh wow, you totally put a smile on my face today.

Report Inappropriate Comment
GRANNYS5 2/9/2010 7:51PM

    This was Fantastic!! Thank you for such entertaining reading. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUE5007 2/9/2010 7:29PM

    You are hilarious!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SCHNEBL 2/9/2010 6:42PM

    Fabulous piece of writing! I teach creative writing and this is a lovely piece. Keep up the good work! (with your weight loss AND your writing!)

Report Inappropriate Comment
VICD25 2/9/2010 5:32PM

    Amen to that! What a great way to put the NUMBER in perspective. Way to put "him" in his place.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NURSEMOMMY82 2/9/2010 5:31PM

    Amazing writing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MINYGRL 2/9/2010 5:24PM

  Puts everything in perspective! He is so seductive, tho......

Report Inappropriate Comment
STARLIGHT615 2/9/2010 5:07PM

    OMG that was totally awesome!!! I emoticon IT!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FATMAN210 2/9/2010 3:53PM

    WOW AND HERE ALL I DO IS STEP ON THE DARN THING AND THINK NOTHING OF IT LOL

Report Inappropriate Comment
DUKEFAN86 2/9/2010 2:56PM

    Loved this! Many thanks for sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JULIAMOONCHILD 2/9/2010 1:00PM

    Absolutely Brilliant!!! Thank you so much for this delightful and truly captivating read.
BRAVO!!

emoticon Even caused me to take a second look at my own "lover". And, thinking now, I might have to throw his *ss to the curb one day soon, too. LOL!

Comment edited on: 2/9/2010 1:06:36 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
MINENA1 2/9/2010 11:01AM

    This was totally emoticon
Loved it!!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MCFERRET 2/9/2010 10:15AM

    Thanks for posting. I can so relate! My cat has been turning the scale on in the morning and it beckons me. But, like many, my weight fluctuates on a daily basis. Alot. Perhaps my love affair should be over and we can just be friends.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MIZZOUMAC 2/9/2010 9:53AM

    Hilarious! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NIKKI7727 2/9/2010 9:53AM

    Great Blog! I loved it! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KCHONEY 2/9/2010 9:34AM

    Loved your blog! That man is EVIL! sometimes...

Report Inappropriate Comment
RAVENDONNA 2/9/2010 7:17AM

  I really enjoyed this! Great writing. AND a great reminder. Thanks

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAMABEARLICIOUS 2/8/2010 11:39PM

    that was great !!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Add Your Comment to the Blog Post


Log in to post a comment.
Member Comments Page (226 total):  1 2 3 Next > Last >>