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    SNEAKYVEGAN   30,564
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I feel heavier than I've ever been...


Wednesday, January 20, 2010

even though i'm not.

I've lost 11 pounds, 1/6 of the 66 pounds I'd like to lose, and a little over 1/5 of the 50 pounds I need to lose in order to be a "healthy" weight. Yet, when I look in the mirror, lately I feel like I look fatter than ever. I think it's because I was in denial about my weight for so long, and my experience on sparkpeople has really forced me to come to terms with that. I can no longer explain the numbers away ("it's water weight" or "it's that time of the month"), I have to own them.

Still, it's frustrating to think "how did I let myself get this way," when, after losing 11 pounds, I should be thinking "woo-hoo, progress!"
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