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Tofurky - You're Doing It Wrong.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

This is a public service announcement.

Do you like seitan? Think veggie burgers are pretty darn tasty? Flip over tempeh? Think tofu is tops? But then you have a Tofurky and you go "blech!"?

Then you, my friend, are the victim of Poorly Cooked Tofurky Syndrome (PCTS)! A well cooked Tofurky is a thing of beauty to behold. One suffering PCTS is not a happy Tofurky. And the folks eating a PCTS dinner are also pretty darn Sad Face.

Want to have Tofurky you can be proud of? Want to serve one that makes folks sit up and go "Boy Howdy!"? While I can't promise that some family member who is a Outspoken Omnivore Who Makes Fun of All Things Vegan won't be a dork (and really OOWMFoATV, it's Thanksgiving. Give it a rest.) I can guarantee a delicious flavor and moist texture.

So, if you're TIRED of bland, dry or just plain bad Tofurky, read on.
Every time you cook a Tofurky poorly, you make LEONALIONESS face palm.
Please, think of my forehead!


Awesome Rockstar Tofurky Recipe (of Doom!)

1 defrosted Tofurky. (Seriously, defrost it. It takes like a BILLION hours if you forget and have to cook it frozen.)

About 4-6 cups of good veggie broth. (I've used just regular veggie, miso, soy ginger, etc. The miso was very distinct and different. I prefer the veggie. Though the soy ginger added a nice sweetness.)

Spices! Lots of them. You can use Herbs de Provence for a truly special flavor. Did that last night and it's my favorite so far. Alternatively, a mix of sage/thyme/marjoram/basil is nice. Use about 3 TBS total spices.

Carrots and Parsnips.
Cut them into thick long matchsticks. I did two huge parsnips and one absolutely enormous carrot. Suit the veggie amounts to your needs.

= = = = = = = = = = = =

* Pour your broth into a glass baking dish.
* Cut Tofurky in half down the middle so you have two half circles.
* Put those circles cut side down into the broth.
* Add the veggies around the roast.
* Crush the dried spices over the whole lot. Make sure you crush them between your palms to release the oils and the full flavor of your spices!
* Baste the Tofurky by ladling broth over the tops of the roast halves about a dozen times.
* Cover pan in foil.
* Bake at 350 for an hour and fifteen minutes, as directed.

No need to baste again, this method keeps the Tofurky very tender. If you want, you can baste. Some of us just really like to do it and I won't stop you. If anything, It'll just make the outside a bit softer.

Let sit covered on top of the stove for a few after the cooking time is done.
The tops/sides of the roast should be a bit drier and a light golden color.
The inside should be moist and flavorful from soaking up the spices and broth.

Eat with your favorite vegan gravy, garlic mashed spuds and those delicious root vegetables that cooked in the broth, too.

Never have PCTS again!
Happy Tofurkyday!


Member Comments About This Blog Post:
APIKOROS 11/19/2011 3:28PM

  How about using a crock pot. It keeps things moist. Field Roast tastes better than Tofurky. Or better yet, making a tofurky at home with vital gluten flour and seasonings.

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    Wow! More awesome cooking ideas from LeonaLioness!!
Thanks so much!

Tofurky has been a hit with the omnis that I've served it to. (A few refused to try it, but that's just being snooty, if you ask me. lol )

Go, vegan, go!

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JLITT62 11/29/2009 8:16AM

    I have never been terribly fond of turkey, personally, but MIL had to have it. So she did it. I've never tried tofurkey personally . . . awfully expensive -- but then, of course, I'm not actually vegan so not actually saving all that money by totally cutting out meat.

Oh, and I did point out the French Meadow Bakery to DH as we walked by it . . . no idea they had vegan foodstuffs. But we weren't eating in the airport anyway, since we were upgraded to first class both ways & actually got fed.

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SHEARWATER 11/23/2009 5:03PM

    Very funny! I like to rub a bit of soy sauce or Bragg's Aminos on it, too, just to help color it and make it look "roasted." It seems to coerce some of the carnivores.

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IMVEGAN 11/22/2009 10:12PM

    Thank you so much. This is my first Thanksgiving as a vegan and I will follow your recipe step by step.

It is funny, I was putting away some muffin tins today and had to move the big roasting pan I bought last October. I thought, "Sh*t I only got to use that pan 2 times and now I have no use for it anymore." Moral of the story: If you are going to become a vegan, don't buy a roasting pan for big fleshy animals. It will end up being a waste of money. LOL

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ARARAIDER 11/22/2009 7:36PM

    Hahaha that made me giggle! A good read indeed. :)

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TERJEGOLD 11/22/2009 6:08PM

    Your way sounds similar to how I have done it in the past. Still, this year I am skipping the tofurkey in favor of a rice loaf of sorts and the various veggie sides. The carnivores will eat the rice loaf but would never in a million years allow tofurkey to commingle on their plate.

I might just try your method, though, while tofurkey is cheap and have it around for snacking on.

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CYBORGKITTEH 11/22/2009 2:52PM

    I wish we could get tofurkey in the UK, I think I might have to try making my own emoticon

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LEONALIONESS 11/22/2009 1:56PM

    "There are so many great Thanksgiving foods why bother with a turkey course?"

Short answer: we like Tofurky.
I'm not trying to replace turkey since Tofurky doesn't taste like turkey. It takes like a really delicious food item that I, and others, happen to enjoy. It's perfectly fine to enjoy so called "meat analogs". Also, I've had omnis like Tofurky before. It depends on the omni and if they are the open-minded, vegan friendly sort or the obnoxious meat and potatoes only sort.

I might be reading too much into your comment. There is a category of fellow veg*n who get holier than thou about those of us who don't mind veggie "meats" and years and years of dealing with them has put me on edge. Apologies if I come off short with you.

In reality, asking "why do a Tofurky?" is like asking someone why they do stuffing or sweet potatoes. It's a food item they like. *shrugs* No added baggage.

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GIANT-STEPS 11/22/2009 1:33PM

  I've made tofurkies various ways and I don't think anything can make them popular with meat eaters.

There are so many great Thanksgiving foods why bother with a turkey course? Mashed potatoes, squash, stuffing, sweet potatoes, cranberry relish and soft rolls really are plenty. I made tofurkies every year but when I skipped it nobody really missed it. There are plenty of great traditional things to eat without turkey.

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