So I've been 2 weeks now "maintaining." I dropped two pounds the first week, but have been holding steady at 133 since then. It has been hard to beat myself away from the treadmill and force myself to eat a few more calories every day. I got so used to a certain lifestyle its hard (and very scary) to go back. I think part of me is trying to play defense, because I know that the holidays are coming up, and I feel like I ought to be "saving" my calories for them.
Tomorrow I head home to my parents house for the first time 3 months. I am excited to see everyone, but I have such trouble with moderation when I'm there. I end up fighting with my mom about food in a matter of days, and typically end up binge eating and drinking out of stress if nothing else. I would probably be better off to just eat her fat with fat on top and a side of syrup for breakfast every morning so I wouldn't have to get myself all riled and end up binging.
But, this will be my first trip home since I started maintaining, and I am hopeful. Last year for the holidays a healthy lifestyle was still so new to me, I gave up on day one and binged for 4 straight days. I think, knowing that I can eat 2000 calories a day as long as I get my 5 workouts in over the course of the week, will make it easier to eat in moderation. I am not going to fret. I will try my best to track, just to keep myself accountable, but I am not going to let it ruin my time at home.
I will go to the gym 4 times.
I will only eat half an entree when I go out to eat (but will allow myself to order what I want!)
I will have one glass of wine with my parents, not a bottle.
I will not eat my feelings.
I will not get drunk and binge eat.

These goals shouldn't be too hard, but I know they will be for me. I am hopeful though, that I can come back from this trip home and get back on track, regardless of what happens.