today i am going to come clean with my shrink

ALBA06's Blog

Thursday, November 05, 2009

today i am going see my shrink but i am going to be totally honest with him and hope he doesn't put me in patient somewhere. i am going to know i take more medication than he prescribes for me because it makes me sleep and i don't feel the pain. i know once i tell him it's over for that because he will call the doctor that prescribes that for me and he will want to stop it. it terrifies me to think i am going to give up something i lean on but at the same time i know it is hurting me and i am abusing it. i am going to let my shrink know how badly i have been feeling and all my thoughts and plans for suicide because if i don't tell him it won't be to long before i will try it. i must sound like a psycho, but what i really am just a scared being looking for some place to hide safely.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PICKIE98 11/8/2009 7:39AM

have you had extensive lab work done to determine chemical imbalances? A general physician would automatically order those,, .. it has to be so frustrating to feel the same, not see the result you want, but insist on trying something else if long-term methods are a no-go!!
You are intelligent and know your body,,, spill your guts, take notes, you can also get copies of your charts for other docs,, it is the law.. Bless you for having the strength through this to take steps...

TINK9305 11/6/2009 2:58PM

Hugz!!! If you need a buddy still you can msg me! I will keep you and your family in my thoughs and prayers!!!

We are here to help support you.

LEONALIONESS 11/5/2009 5:00PM

It takes a lot of guts to ask for help.
I think you are very brave and I hope you find the help you need.

Best wishes.

DANCETAXI22 11/5/2009 3:36PM

Oh please please come clean and tell your shrink! Ask for help, because you are worth it.

Overmedicating is a sign that you need to try a different track. Don't give up! These are temporary problems that have a solution. Just keep looking.

I speak from that dark place, because I've been there. Don't ever give up.

Danette

JLITT62 11/5/2009 3:32PM

You are doing the right thing. I know it will be hard, but in the long run, it will help you. You don't sound crazy at all, just like a person in pain -- and it's exactly a therapist's job to help you.

A big congrats for having the courage to be honest.

SHIRLANGEL 11/5/2009 9:34AM

Kudos to you! It's GREAT that you're going to come clean with your shrink. That's the only way he'll really be able to help you. The important thing is that you do what you need to do to get better.

Whatever you do don't chicken out. Write down the things you need to tell your shrink. If you can't say it, then hand him the letter so he can read it.

I'm so happy that you're going to take this step! So very happy and proud that you are doing what you need to do.

Still Praying For You,
Shirley

CAPECODDIN 11/5/2009 9:11AM

I am glad to hear that you are doing something so positive for yourself! Be gentle with yourself... try not to beat yourself up... my friend died by suicide and it leaves everyone devastated for a very long time.

Suicide is a permanent action for a temporary problem... you can get out of this viscous cycle, but you can't do it alone, you need professional help to guide and help you to make some changes, and feel better about yourself.... depression is a disease and should be treated as such, it's nothing to be embarrassed about but right not you are in crisis... I am not trying to scare you, but they might admit you for an evaluation so they can really figure out a better solution, so you might want to hide a key outside your place so that someone can get things for you and check on your place..... do not be afraid!!!! You have a right to a solution to this pain!!!

my thoughts and prayers are with you..
cynthia

SEEKINGMYSELF 11/5/2009 9:06AM

I am so glad you are going to talk to your shrink about all that has been going on. It is scary but the alternatives are scarier! Good luck today. You have a lot of support here. Try to keep that in mind when you have your talk.

SHAR1717 11/5/2009 8:42AM

I know all about what you are dealing with. I don't so much take extra pills but I self harm in other ways - which I won't go into here. Ive been in the hospital a bazillion times in my career with PTSD, Major Depression and DID. In fact when I see my therapist today I have to 'come clean' with her about how I have really been self-harming around the house by doing too much and hurting my body which is already in bad shape. Im sending you strength in my thoughts today and will watch for your progress.

ASTORRES1 11/5/2009 7:40AM

Melissa....
Happy to hear that....YOU need to come clean for YOU......deal with the consequences....in the end it will be better....for you and your family.

amy