Wow. Tapering is very strange. After the high of completing 20 miles, I am truly bored. And tired.

I got sick over last weekend, and I wasn't able to complete the 12 mile run. I only did 5 miles. Then I stayed in bed all day Tuesday, and missed the 4 mile run that day. Wednesday and Thursday I went on a mill trip for work, and did my 6 mile run at the hotel fitness center. Yesterday I almost did the 3 miles that were scheduled.. but came up short due to a route calculation error.

I am happy to be running again. But, in every run, I feel exhausted. Each one feels like effort. Mostly, I have been in bed sleeping. I think I could sleep for days.

The dizziness is gone, so I think I am getting better. I've heard getting a strange fatigue or sickness is part of the taper. I hate to be cliche. But, it's happened to me.

This weekend I'm signed up for a 5 mile race & then a friend is making me finish the 8 miles for the day with them. So, I can't back out. I'm trying to get psyched for it. And rest up for it too. I know I can run much farther than that, but today just the thought makes me tired.

What is missing, is the PSYCH. I used to get really psyched up for every long run, because for the most part I was running somewhere new - or the farthest I had ever run before. Now? I feel like it's just a placeholder. I would rather not do any of these silly runs during taper time.

I haven't been counting down the days*. Instead, I've been counting up the weeks of training. I'm proud I completed it all as well as I have. I'm amazed by that.

I can't believe the marathon is coming. I think I might be in denial about it. I know it's a big huge deal and it's the reason I've been running all this time. But also, it's been a pie in the sky dream. It's been my motivation. I think if I never ran the actual race I would be fine. It's given me a mission and a reason to move my body to new places.

Technically, my friends and I are discussing the finish - what bar we should go to. All the details. My family is coming. But, I'm not nervous at all. I haven't had any nightmares, nothing, like my friends have.

I'm waiting for the anxiety to hit. But, it its place I'll take the sleep.

(* 8 Days Left... just counted)