Thursday, October 22, 2009
I weighed myself this morning. I am still the 278 pounds I was a few weeks ago when I decided that I had put off the inevitable for too long. Considering my melt down of yesterday, I suppose I should be happy it's not more!
One thing I am learning on this journey of weight loss is that there is so much more to be learned than just staying away from the ice cream (right Moniesa? lol) or skipping the extra slice of pizza or making excuses to not go work out. That really only addresses the physical weight that needs to be shed. But what of the emotional weight, that baggage that we all carry? How does one lose that?
Yesterday I spoke of not letting the negative emotions of the day have power over me, and I firmly believe that to be true if for no other reason than I refuse to let another night's sleep be ruined by stupidity, ignorance and selfishness. But I think there is also something to be gained from harnessing the power that those negative feelings can bring about and use them in a more powerful, more positive way.
I am learning that it is possible to have friends, kindred spirits who may be a world away, look out for me like guardian angels and support me. These people, these new friends of mine are blessings that I am so grateful for having had the pleasure of stumbling across like a treasure in a second hand shop.
They are strong, they are incredible, they are beautiful, they are flawed and yet perfect, and they are so very real and in the now. The women are teachers, whether they know it or not and I am a willing student.
So I woke up today, knowing I had this new power and the strength and courage of others with me and I *am* moving on. I am a stronger person and the only one that can stop me is myself.
I'm getting my game face on and am ready for battle - nothing can stop me now!