Random thoughts in the wee hours of the morning...
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
My 3 yr old daughter woke up around 1145 and then after getting her settled, I was wide awake. I watched Biggest Loser and was once again amazed by the rally of support between team members(Still don't like Tracey though!). I was wide awake and since my Mom is in France, I decided to sneak over use her internet as well as pick up our winter coats-the high is going to be in the 40's on Thursday & Friday.
It's now 0244 and I'm wide awake. Fortunately, I am off today so I can get rest later. Around 6ish I need to get same daughter up & ready for pre-school. Then I have an appt to go get bloodwork done. I think I'm a little apprehensive about this. I've noticed that I've been having increased thirst-but I have also been trying to get my water consumption back up. I have been having memory loss as well as slight depression. When I had my GYN visit last week, my doctor & I discussed this. She asked me if I wanted meds-I SO DO NOT. I took Zoloft for around 4 months before I found I was pregnant. I HATE taking medication. I stopped taking it after I knew I was pregnant. My doctor said it would be fine, but I worried about what would be discovered later on down the road. Sorry. I digress. As I was saying, she asked if I needed meds and at the time, I felt that it was just me needing to workout. So she said, "It's situational". But when I was going home earlier this evening, last evening, I just realized that I was feeling kind of depressed. I have an appt with a new doctor for my physical but that won't be until December. I think I will try and contact my GYN and see if she can call & get me in any sooner.
I'm concerned about my mindset. I know that I need to lose weight and get healthy. However, I just don't seem to be doing what needs to be done. So maybe depression might be playing a role in this, although I hope it isn't.
Hopefully my bloodtests will reveal what's going on with me. In the meantime, I just need to take things ONE BABY STEP AT A TIME!