Wednesday, October 07, 2009
I'm 55. I know I don't look that old to the average viewer, I've been blessed with plump cheeks and skin that doesn't wrinkle a lot. But I also have monthly facials to cope with the dark splotches I developed on my high cheekbones, I color my hair (medium brown with grey is just way too mousey a color for my artistic self), and I see the sagging chin, fine lines around my mouth, and sore knees and back and shoulders.
I feel like a "tweenior" - you know, there are the tweeners, the kids who are pre-pubescent but not quite little kids. Well, someone needs to come up with a phrase for those of us who are moving out of middle-middle age toward senior age - I think tweenior fits well. So much better than the "woman of a certain age" which implies raging menopause and frumpy clothes and all that.
Because despite the hot flashes and widening waist and worn out joints, I have more energy than I did 40+ lbs ago. I have more patience than I did when it was hard to walk up the stairs at school, when my knees and my back would go out frequently, when I'd huff and puff as I walked because it was so much work to move.
Now I can walk 5 to 8 miles a day with no problem. I race up and down the stairs at school with little effort. I'm out of the "plus" size clothes, and in many cases I'm not even an XL - a plain old L will fit fine - so I'm out of the old lady-ish clothes and back to my fashionista self.
Some things will never be the same - I'll always have knee and back problems, having fallen after a hurricane and torn everything in one knee. I'll always have problems finding jeans that fit, because I'm long waisted and have never had a small waist. And, well, the "girls" will never be what they were pre-menopause.
But I have wisdom (I like to think), I have life experience, I've travelled and had fun, I continue to travel and have fun, I found a wonderful DH who likes to do similar things, and I like to think I've been a positive influence on my students and the people around me.
So - life is good. Even at tweenior status. Life is good.