Frustration and learning to let things go.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
This month has been a month of frustration. Frustration with things I could control and frustration with things I can't. The biggest has been the pains I've been having and getting my test results back. It's been 3 weeks since yesterday since I've had my ultra sounds done. The tech told me it would take about 4 days to get the results in. So I waited till the 5th day and called. That woman told me, no they take a week to read, but she took my name and phone # and said we'll call you when they are in. So I wait. Next week comes around. I call and tell them it's been 2 weeks I would like my results. Again they take my name and # and say they'll call me. Now it's this week. Still no phone call. Now I am going to call them again, but I am wondering.. will they call me back? In my own mind I can assume that because they didn't call me, that nothing is wrong and the test came back fine. However that might not be the case. I doubt anything is seriously wrong, but I would still like a phone call. However I am letting it go. If something is wrong, then I will deal with it when I get there and why worry about it if they'll just tell me everything was fine. Another frustration was yesterday. I had ordered new glasses and sun glasses the other week. They came in yesterday so I picked them up. Well the eye place forgot to mention that they no longer do policarb lenses in my prescription when I ordered them in the first place. So when I took a look at my sun glasses they were like 2 inches thick. Even though my eyes only changed about 2 points they can't do it.. yet they did it before in my current sun glasses. So the only thing I could do was pick out new frames. So there I was at the eye place about to cry trying to find something that would work. To top that off, I asked them to NOT polish and ROLL the edges of my actual glasses. What did they do.. the exact opposite. They POLISHED and DIDN'T roll the edges. So now I have to go back and give back my glasses for them to correct. I also have to find out how much the price is different from the old sun glass frames to the ones I picked out. My grandmother generously bought the glasses and sun glasses for me, so I don't want her having to pay more for something else. But I am letting it go. Even though I did get upset by this, I don't need to be. It can always be corrected. I only wish the eye place was open later then 6pm and I didn't have to wait until Thursday to get them over there. 3rd frustration.. this one can't be blamed on a mix up in the lab or people not calling me back. I have to take it all myself. My pants are too tight. My jeans to be more exact. Even after they were washed and dried on warm they still slid on fairly easily. Not any more. They are tight and not in the good 'every young woman should have a pair of cute tight jeans' tight either. I haven't been working out. I do some pliates here and some weight lifting there, but nothing consistent and we've ben buying not the greatest stuff at home either. I let myself get sucked into buy ice cream or cookies or any other type treat and then I eat it. Even though I don't eat it like I used to, you can't eat the junk if you don't do something to get rid of the junk. The whole reason I lost weight in the first place was that I stopped eating the junk and exercised at least twice a week. I'm not going to let this go though. The boy has decided that I should work out 3 days a week. Mostly because of how tired and sore I was from working the Greek Fest. If I had been working out the whole time; I'm sure I would still be tired, but maybe I wouldn't have been as sore. So I agree with him. I need to work out. I may not want to, but I need to. I am feeling jiggly and flabby and I don't want to anymore. I just need that extra push to do this. This I don't want to let go.