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    KRYSTALCLARKE18   13,119
10,000-14,999 SparkPoints

An especially tough Saturday

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Today was a tough day... I spent most of it sitting in front of my window looking outside. I wanted to go out, but I didn't want to see anyone. I was thinking too much, about life in general; got me feeling pretty low. Although I'm losing at a normal rate (1.5-3 lbs a week), I still feel like I'm not making any progress. My arms are looking more flabby and my pants are uncomfortably loose so I'm feeling more awkward than anything. I am making healthier choices the large majority of the time. But whenever I make a not-so-healthy choice, although I shrug it off at the moment, I am so down on myself for hours afterwards. I have no idea why I do this! I feel like I have no will power! I don't know what the heck is wrong with me and I would like to know why I can't seem to feel proud of my achievements... why I have to convince myself that I am doing well, even though the numbers on the scale should be enough convincing. I have a great job but I still feel like a failure; every day! I wish it were as simple as bringing myself to a mechanic and just saying "fix me"! But it's not.... Not too sure how to conclude this blog since the concept isn't even complete in my mind. Maybe I'll feel a bit better tomorrow.

Member Comments About This Blog Post:
SLOLOSER 9/16/2009 1:57AM

    Blogging is a healthy choice!


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SI1V3RBACK 9/13/2009 5:35PM

    Hi, sounds like a rough day for you indeed ... and on such a sunny day too. Odd thing is it doesn't seem like you have much to fix dietwise that is. Your weight loss progress is about 2 to 3 lbs which is fabulous. I wouldn't recommend any more than that so that is going great. I appreciate you may feel that you aren't progressing outwardly in appearance as you would like but I suspect you are being way too hard on yourself like you are about your not so healthy food choices when you weight progress is great. Only thing I would recommend if you are doing it much is exercise, more. That may help boost your self-confidence a bit and generally is a great mood uplifter I think.

Hope Sunday is the beginning of many better days to come.

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LIZ-GS 9/12/2009 11:03PM

    Whew! Yep - a tough Saturday! Glad it's over - onto a new day! Don't look behind - that's not where we're heading...

I spent that last 2 days in my 'slug cave' & decided it's time to end my slugfest. So here I am - join me.

I've learned connections pull me outside myself and keep me walking forward. I'm going back to making one good mini-decision at a time & letting the little single good decisions become a day's worth of health.

Onward we go! Spark On my friend, Spark on! : ) Liz

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JUST_HEATHER 9/12/2009 10:32PM

    Don't beat yourself up, enough people around us do it for us. Even if every choice isn't made perfectly, are you making more better choices than before? If you continue to make more and more better choices it's likely you'll still make a bad choice occasionally but in the big picture it won't be very noticeable.

Forgive yourself and start fresh tomorrow.

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