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    ZORBS13   105,687
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POOP


Monday, August 24, 2009

www.runsaturday.com/tabI
d/64/activityId/133226/Def
ault.aspx

This race can be summarized in one word: POOP.

Consider yourself warned!

I am a morning person through and through, so evening races and even late morning races are not my thing. The only evening race experience I have is a 5K that starts at 9 pm.

Race morning had me waking up at my usual 5 am to be at a fitness conference for 7:30, done at 11:30, 2 lectures, no workouts, no problem.

The first mishap happened at lunch. I now know why people don't eat pasta for breakfast the morning of a marathon..you need to DIGEST!

I was staying at my parent's house and mom bought that nasty white pasta with added fibre, and it just did not agree with me. Normally, I carb load the night before, and drink coffee pre race to clear out the tubes. On Saturday, I ate my pasta at lunch, and only had time for a short nap.

Mistake #2: this was yet another race where you had to take a bus to the start line, they tell you to come early, and end up having over an hour of sit around and do nothing before running. I don't do well sitting around doing nothing.

So, without getting into the nitty gritty...I had to stop *3* times during the race to poop! First time, I used my pantyliner to wipe, 2nd time, I went in a bathroom (totally filthy but at least there was TP) and 3rd time I just danced a jig.

There was also a 15K race that started an hour later, which meant that along the line, we got lapped by the 15K leaders. There was this guy who ran by...his legs were BROWN. Beth and I said, "OMG OMG OMG IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?!?!!" and my thoughts about that were, "at least I managed to make it into the trees!" and "I wouldn't run behind that guy if you paid me a million dollars!"

The terrain was "mixed" to say the least, it included railway tracks, cracked asphalt, small gravel, large loose rocks, muddy potholes 3" deep, and rotting boardwalk.

We started in the back, I mean RIGHT in the back and I have never placed so poorly in a race...but we were conservative about pace and ran pretty much even splits - they were just slow...so we passed a bunch of badly fading people in the last kilometer or so.

And I lied in my status about 2 mosquito bites...it's more like 10, ALL OVER my upper body...including 4 in my armpit. How the HELL did that happen?!?!

Field Placement: 684 / 771 (88.7%)
Age group: 30 39
Group Placement: 119 / 139 (85.6%)
Gender Placement: 325 / 385 (84.4%)

Less than 5 weeks until marathon race day!

This Saturday is the goal 5K for my Learn to Run ladies who have come SO FAR! It is a nice, normal morning race, no shuttle bus or carb loading problems to be anticipated.

Goals for 5K:

Base: finish upright and smiling, avoid mosquitoes, cheer on my Learn to Run gals.
Stretch: sub 30 minutes
Reach: PR (current PR - 25:43)
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Member Comments About This Blog Post:
SKYFYRE 8/25/2009 7:34PM

    Ick, poop, poop and more poop.What a dreadful, but funny race!

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JEM0622 8/25/2009 11:23AM

    Wiping the tears from my eyes as I read your blog. Too freakin hilarious! When I ran my half marathon I saw um, something...in the road...and I was pretty sure that a runner 'dropped' it. Not kidding. I just laughed to myself on the inside and was glad it didn't happen to me! Way to go on your finish!

~julie

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DANIELLECOTE 8/24/2009 8:15PM

    This was hilarious! I guess it's fair to say you were all "pooped" out by day's end! I'm so relieved to hear about the bladder issues from another poster. I've resorted to wearing Poise Pads on my longer runs. I live in the AZ desert so there's no trees to hide behind. If you're lucky, you can sneak behind a small rock before someone catches you! Today it's "poised"... tomorrow "depends". LOL! If I'm investing in the potty-tools now, what on earth do I have to look forward to when I get older???

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ELFITZPA 8/24/2009 5:30PM

    Ouch - I have so been there on long training runs, but fortunately never on race day! I've raced enough times on a full bladder without stopping, and I know there's no way I could not NOT stop if it wasn't just the bladder yelling at me. I'm sorry you had such a rough day but great job keeping even splits, and consider it a group training run for your upcoming marathon!

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JOYINRUNNING08 8/24/2009 4:55PM

    Oh CRAP! Hardddyyy harrrr!

:(

Honestly I had that happen the first marathon I ran. We ate at the Weber Grill the evening before and I SWEAR to everything holy that when I used the porto pot it smelled like BEEF BRISKET. Gross.

No brown racing stripes though.

Comment edited on: 8/24/2009 4:56:15 PM

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SWEATONCEADAY 8/24/2009 4:07PM

    you had a poopy race. at least it wasn't sh!tty like that guy. i am sure your next race will be great. i am so a morning runner too. i always get tummy issues if i run later in the day.

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ZIRCADIA 8/24/2009 4:03PM

    OH WOW. Um,.... I don't even know what to say about that 15K er. Oh my.

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MBSHAZZER 8/24/2009 4:00PM

    Way to go, poop and all! HAHA! That has never happened to me during a race, and I have to say... I'm glad. At my last half, I was using this woman in bright yellow shorts to pace myself... I kept losing her though.. after the race, she told me she was having "stomach issues" and kept using the porta potties.. does not sound like fun.

Anyway, great race! Sorry about the mosquitos. Looking forward to hearing about your new runners' success!

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BRUIN2 8/24/2009 4:00PM

    OMG OMG OMG.

That is SO GROSS about that guy. Can you imagine a race mattering *that much* to you that you relieve yourself while running?!?!? I CAN NOT.

Yuck.

And good for you for making it through the race despite the tummy issues. No fun.

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