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Too fat to dance with


Monday, August 17, 2009

You know the drill. We were at our first seventh grade sock hop. My friend asked a boy I had a crush on if he would ask me to dance. He politely said "no." My friend pushed the dreaded question and asked, "Why not?"

He really was a nice boy, because he didn't want to hurt my feelings. My well-meaning, but pushy friend claimed he said three times he didn't know why he wouldn't dance with, until he finally broke down under pressure. "I don't mean any harm," he said. "She's really nice and I like her as a friend, but she's just too fat to dance with."

Again, I don't think he meant to be nasty. He was just being honest---brutally honest. I mean, come on, we were at the ever-so-awkward age of 13. We were greasy haired adolescents who wanted desperately to fit in or blend in with the nervous crowd at our first dance that day.

But no matter what age, when you're fat, you don't blend in. Remember you're FAT, right? So you stick out (literally) in places other (skinny) kids don't. So I really do understand why dancing with the fattest girl in the class was not at the top of his list.

But the truth hurts! It was then that I began to admit to myself that not only was I fat, but my weight was negatively impacting my life, my relations with others, and how I felt about myself.

I was too fat to dance with? I was.

And those truthful words left painful scars on my budding self esteem and tender body image I still carry with me today.

Today? Yes, believe it or not, today. I still have those 31 year-old scars after all these years! And, thankfully today, these scars help me more than hurt me.

How? There is nothing stronger than scar tissue! Just like your muscles need to be broken down to increase your muscle mass, my battles with weight gain and a fragile body image make me passionate about being healthy and motivating others to do the same.

Jess Krauser is a certified group exercise instructor at the Wheaton Sport Center, and a certified personal trainer. Jess is also a seasoned running coach, who developed and implemented Marathon training programs for the Wheaton Sport Center.
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

OZDIVER 8/17/2009 9:02AM

  Welcome to the boards and best wishes on your adventure!

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4EVERBEUTIFUL 8/17/2009 8:41AM

    I had a similar experience in Grade 8 only a popular boy did ask me to dance however me having the low self-esteem that I had thought he was asking just so that him and his friends had something to laugh about later on so I politely declined. I'm still not sure if he was genuine or not I just was sick of being made fun of. I hope you lose the weight you desire I know you can do it I can read the desire in your writing. emoticon

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BOOMERGIRL5 8/17/2009 8:39AM

    Thanks for writing this blog it really made me think

What helped me was when I decided to do everything for myself I seen no one or anything was going to make me happy but me also what helped was I decided to get healthy and the weight loss was just a gimmie

Good luck on your journey we are all here to support you

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JESSIE4168 8/17/2009 8:39AM

  what a wonderful blog! you have such an upbeat attitude. you can do this! you will succeed and reach your goal weight. i believe in you. you are worth it. i,too, was not asked to dance because of my weight at the time and at the same age,too. that made me realize that i had to take better care of myself so i would be around to see any future children grow up. now, i finally got the last of my extra weight off, through sparkpeople. this is a great site! i find it very helpful,motivating and supporting. i now have a beautiful 4 and a half year old daughter to raise. anytime you need a shoulder or two to lean on,i am here for you. have a great day!

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