It Was a Very Good Year
Wednesday, August 05, 2009
It’s hard for me to believe it, but today marks my one-year anniversary with
Spark People. One would think it would be easy for me to write a thoughtful reflection on the occasion, but it’s not.
I didn’t come here looking for a magic wand to wave or even a new diet plan. In fact, I came here because I’d become involved in another social networking site and my (then) health coach recommended I check it out. (If you’re reading this, Jennifer, I will forever be grateful for that recommendation, for what you taught me, and the time we had together.)
I’ve applied what I’ve learned about self-examination, social support, and goal setting to so many areas of my life over the past year, from fitness goals to de-cluttering goals, to financial goals. I’m going to be perfectly honest with you. I haven’t lost a lot of weight. I haven’t run a marathon. I haven’t paid off all my debt. And I still have areas of my home that are packed with way too much stuff.
But I’m a very different person than I was a year ago. I have more “tools” in my tool box, and I actually get them out and use them. I’ve learned the value of being brutally honest with myself and of giving and receiving social support. I’ve learned the meaning of “good enough”. I’ve learned when it’s time to let something go--possessions, beliefs, behavior patterns, and even people that no longer suit the me I’ve become. I’ve learned about my value and not to waste my time worrying about those who don’t appreciate it. I have more confidence in myself and my ability to make a plan for the unknown we call tomorrow, and to adjust it as necessary. I’ve learned to operate in faith rather than fear more often than not.
Bottom line is that I’m becoming the kind of person I have long admired and felt I couldn’t be. And I’ve learned that feelings can be tricky things that can get me into a whole lot of trouble if I’m not careful. They’re often unreliable. They can change very quickly. And perhaps most remarkably, I’ve learned that I have the power to choose the ones that benefit me and reject the ones that don’t.
I am still a work in progress, to be sure. But the Spark has been lit, and it’s propelling me in the right direction. So happy anniversary, Gnuattitude. The best is yet to come!