Tuesday, July 07, 2009
For the past several days I've thrown myself under the food bus...eating poorly and in large amounts. It must be on my mind a lot because last night I had a dream about being in the bakery section of a grocery store, randomly eating cookies from various packages, haha! In my dream, I then went back to see if I could find the nutritional content of all the junk I ate so I could log it properly.
But really, I think I'm just getting a little worn out from all the maintenance this lifestyle demands from me. It could be PMS (isn't it ALWAYS???), but I feel really deprived this past week. Nothing I eat fills me up. And nothing seems to have the right "mouth feel", if you know what I mean. My healthy food just doesn't seem tasty right now. Oh, but that calzone, whooooweeee! That hit the spot. And the 5 Cheez its I stole out of the box at midnight last night, they tasted like little crispy morsels of sheer delight (no, I didn't log them, so stop looking for them!).
My motivation is dwindling. Maybe it's only for today....maybe for the rest of the week. I hope it's not gone forever. I know my workouts and the food choices I've made in the past 4 months have changed my body. I've been shopping lately, grabbing medium shirts off the rack just to see if my transformation is for real. I'm down from a tight fitting 18 to an almost there 14. I know if I keep this up, my mom won't recognize me the next time she sees me. But, alas....is it enough to keep me on track? Even the "health benefits" of my "healthy lifestyle" aren't helping me find energy today.
My workout shoes are laying here right next to my desk. I could put them on and tough it out with Jillian. But...my bed is within the same proximity. I might make Jillian wait.