Thursday, June 25, 2009
Depression is very real in our society. I only had a mild case of depression two years ago. I felt like my whole world was crumbling. I would try to get out of bed and had to drag myself out. I would want to lay on the couch all day. Take naps all the time. I finally went to the doctor to find out what my problem was.
Some background info on me. Divorced and remarried. I had a child and my husband had two. Together we had two more to bring our total up to 5 kids. It is stressful enough being a blended family. The exes always present problems. My husband is in the military and is called up to go to Iraq. His mother moves in because she is homeless at the time. So I have al these outside pressures working against me.
I told the doctor the story and he said no wonder your depressed! He explained to me that there wasn't a whole lot of sunshine during the winter months. He put me on a light dose of medicine. I took the medicine. It made me not want to sleep. I was walking around like zombie. I felt like I was so tired but couldn't sleep. I had to figure something out!
I started on Spark keeping track of all my eating patterns. I would sit outside in my coat and hat trying to soak up as much sun as I could. It felt so nice to sit on a lawn chair on my front porch in the middle of winter soaking in some rays. I changed the way I ate and the way I exercised. At the time I didn't have a real exercise regime. I would do a little here and there. I still have not met my weight loss goal but I am off the Med's.
I started walking around our school track right across the road. I swim as much as the 1 yr old allows me to while clinging to my back. The 3 yr old is a fish with a life vest on. The older kids go off with the friends. I started to realize I love all the kids but I need my time also. It doesn't matter if its just gardening or walking. Whatever it may be. It doesn't matter as long as its time for me.
Tow years later and the husband is off to Afghanistan this time, motherin law just moved out and the kids all home for the summer. I am still ok! I have my days but nothing like before. I can handle whatever is thrown at me at this point. I keep a routine for the most part and I don't stress over it. I have been trying to soak in some vitamin D by the pool side lately. Some of my friends have been coming to the pool also hand hanging out poolside with me as the kids play.