new day

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Ok I woke up still feeling kind of alone and scared of it all..But I got on the treadmill and blasted some positive music in my headphones and cried for a little while as I walked. I know that sounds weird (I felt weird doing it) BUT it really released a ton of bad juju lol It really was just a lot of nervous energy I had to get rid of.

I then logged onto SP to blog again and saw some nice messages from other members that really helped me feel like I am not alone in this :) I am new here, and don't have a lot of support in my everyday life so it really boosted me. ((hugs))
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I am so sorry to hear that, your family sounds a bit like mine ~
    I sent you a message :) ttys emoticon
    3194 days ago
    I don't have a lot of support either. I have been told by my father that I gained the weight because I am weak. "You used to be so beautiful! A model and now look at you. Your nothing but weak crap now." The fact that I've had two kids and am over 40 means nothing to him. I have other MALE overweight family members that he just refers to as "living well" and they just tease me about my thunder thighs and huge butt. "Too bad you can't gain weight in the bust-you would be HUGE!!" they say. I have a stick thin daughter who is horrified about "fat genes" (thanks to comment from family) and a son who is on the heavy side who is just considered "Husky". I am trying to get us to eat better and exercise as much as possible-hard at family gatherings when I make good-for-us food to have it eaten by others leaving me with the pizza and chips that are left and being made to feel like a problem child when they want to play cards after eating and I suggest a nice walk then excluded from the games when I return from said solo walk. "We've already started!" I am a single parent so everything falls on me. When I fail at my goals I feel it in everything I do. I also see my kids watch me fail. I want a support system so badly! I feel your angst. I even snapped at my son the other day when I was overwhelmed with so much going on and he reminded me we needed to go exercise. "I don't have TIME!" I did some strength training later and I cried. I understand. Another good thing about this venue. You hang in there. At least we are trying-more than others can say. More power to you-to US!!
    3198 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/14/2009 5:22:39 PM
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