Any man can call time out, but no man can say for how long. (Vonnegut)
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
"I'm taking my time to figure out where I want things in the kitchen. When I'm done, I'll give away what doesn't fit."
When I typed that, nine months ago, I didn't actually intend to take a year to empty the kitchen boxes. Last night I consolidated the last four boxes into two.
It's been a tough year. On January 9 I went to my family practice doctor for what I thought was a sinus infection. I was in a leukemic crisis; it's a miracle I was able to stand up, much less drive there without an accident. I was taken straight to the hospital by ambulance. My red blood cell count was astonishingly low. Neither the EMTs nor the ER doctor would start an IV until I had a blood transfusion, for fear of pushing my hemaglobin, as a percentage of the total blood volume, too low to sustain life.
I ended up in the hospital a total of four times. For the last four months I've been trying to recover from the cancer treatment. The side effects have been so serious that I didn't have to justify to my oncologist why I was refusing further chemotherapy; she had already reached the same decision.
I've been home from the hospital about six weeks, now. I'm just this week beginning to feel safe driving, and I'm doing more for myself.
It's been tough.