It's sabotage!!!!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Well week 2 BFL is done.....and I didn't do much good. My weight went up by .6lbs but the worse part is the extra inches that I put on. Here is what happened....I totally sabotageg my own plan.

I have been super stressed out lately with school exams and personal familly issues. Especially this week I have been so tired, exhausted actually. I had bad insomnia and I think I got all of 10 hours sleep all week. All these things definately affected me but when I tell myself this I know they are all just EXCUSES. There is always something going on, that life, it doesn't stop for 3 months so I can get my act together!!!! I have been doing this for so long; making progress and goals and then SABOTAGE! It's like I am scared to be happy or to succeed. Man is it ever starting to drive me bananas!!!!!!

So here is how week 2 of BFL worked out:

I did 1.....yes just1, great HIIT workout. That's it! Pretty impressive hey? That is all I did for workouts for the whole week. It seems like after that 1 workout every other day I always had a great excuse or I would tell myself: "I'll just workout EXTRA hard tomorow" HaHaHaHa! Yeah right, like that isn't lying to yourself. So every day I just came up with one excuse better than the next.

Now for food. This was exceptionally...hmmmmm..what is the word???? There is no word good enough to describe what I ate throughout the week! Let me give you an idea: We ate out almost every night and lets just say I didn't order the steamed fish. And of course we went to the little "casse croute" near our house twice for lunch. I have to explain to you what "casse croute"'s a chip stand basically. Oh but wait....I didn't just have burgers and fries, NOOOOO I had to get a huge cheeseburger with everything on it, a hot dog, and a large poutine and a pop. A poutine is a plate of fries covered with cheese curds and gravy. Trust me it is is also probably 800 calories too. During the day I would just munch on anything I could get my hands on, especially at school between exams. Did I eat any of the food I had preped???? Of course not, that would have been to easy! LOL Let's see, what else, oh yes.....I did a solid 2 days of binging. Yup, I stuffed my face with McDonalds (which isn't even that good), 5 pepperoni sticks, a bag of chips, 2 chocolate bars, some pop (about 1/2L), a whole lot of cheese, half a bag of Oreo's, some pasta salad, ribs, some more hot dogs and a poutine. This ways in one day of binging. I won't even bother writting what I ate the second day because I lost track. Talk about losing control! Emotional eater??? You think?

No matter what my excuses there is none good enough to justify why I treated my body that way! And it just shows, I gained some extra inches. As I am writting this down I am doing it with some humor because I beat myself up enough yesterday. There is nothing I can do about it now but regain control this week. Just writting down the food that I ate was therapeutic. I am hoping that next time I want to binge I will just read this and remember how I felt yesterday.

So no matter how bad week 2 was I am still going to try my best to push through and make it through my 12 weeks. Yesterday and today I had great workouts and my food was on par. So all I can do is try to keep it up. I know at some point I will stumble, we all do, I just have to pick myself back up.....ALWAYS!

Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
    oh hunny girl!!!! i totally feel for you. that seems like quite the week! but its so great that you are able to pick yourself up and regroup. don't focus on the past, only today and this moment and by making smart choices you will end up exactly where you want to end up. you are so strong and beautiful and capable!! you can DO this!! i admire you because if i lived in Quebec i don't know how i would avoid poutine, every single day. also, remember that you can still have small indulgences included in your daily life. for me, if i tell myself, i can never eat chocolate again or else i'll be fat, then i just end up eating lots and lots of chocolate! so i just say i can include it, count its calories, and have a small bit, and ya know what? i don't even usually want it! so funny.
    i'm so glad you're having a good couple of days, and that will turn into a week, into a month, into you!!!!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3248 days ago
    I love your attitude, Caroline!! Just pick yourself up and move FORWARD!! Way to go! And you are right--we ALL stumble! There isn't a person on this site that hasn't messed up! I'm proud of you for getting right back to your BFL challenge!
    3249 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment

    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.

More Blogs by SUGAHSUGAH