Thursday, April 09, 2009
I am really feeling pretty good about the changes I have made this week.
I have gone OVER my calorie range for the past 3 days - I know this because I still track every morsel of food that I put into my mouth and I have done this for almost 3 years.
I am still walking on the treadmill, but NOT striving to go faster or at a higher elevation any longer. I keep tracking the exercising, though, just like I have for almost 3 years.
I have STOPPED most of the message boards that I was on. Since positive reinforcement and support from other people has not helped me lose weight, there's no point in staying connected any longer. How can I dare preach to others when I cannot show any weight loss progress to them?
In short, I am not really on a weight loss program any more-- since I cannot lose any weight, now my "program" fits my lifestyle.
Isn't it one of life's great mysteries that you can somehow get yourself all excited about losing weight, get yourself on a serious program of healthy eating, exercise, and water drinking, and then not lose any weight FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR. I mean, how much more striving can you do with absolutely nothing to show for it?
I have all the statistics to prove that I have been drinking 10-14 glasses of water for the past 3 years. I have been eating healthy for the past 3 years. I have 14,500 minutes of exercised logged. So if all of this is not working, it is time to stop trying to lose weight. It is just not going to happen.
I must get rid of the few pieces of smaller clothes that I bought last year, though. I was an idiot to ever think that I could lose down just one size in a year! Maybe I would have in a perfect world, but my world is sure not perfect.
I am still trying to get my head around the fact that I am never going to be any smaller than I am right now. Maybe eventually I will come to accept this.